Earth Explode Blog

The Day Democracy Dies…

2009-03-16T02:00:00.002+08:00

Do you know the full story of The Day Democracy Dies?

If you don't be sure to head over to the following page to know more about it:-
http://www.malaysiandilemma.com/?p=57

It is worth a read. ;)

The World of Change

2008-07-14T01:06:00.001+08:00

In the world of change, the learners will dominate the world, while the learned will find themselves fully equipped to face the world which no longer exist.

SPM 2008 Result Out on the 12th of March 2008!

2008-03-04T01:36:00.004+08:00

The 2007/2008 Sijil Pelajaran Malaysia (SPM) result will be announced on the 12th of March 2008.
Students can collect their result slips from schools starting at 10.00am.

There are 439,255 candidates sitting for the SPM at 3,913 exam stations nationwide last year.

Among those, 386,265 or 87.9% are students from the schools supported by the Ministry of Education while 14,672 or 3.4% are students from schools supported by state governments and other bodies.

Besides that, 10,687 (2.4%) are students from private schools while 27, 631 or 6.3% are private candidates.

UPDATE: SPM 2009 is released on the 12th of March as well. What a coincidence? I guess my prediction is quite true. ;)

Barisan Rakyat Poster

2008-03-04T01:28:00.004+08:00

Barisan Rakyat (The People's Front - 民阵) is made up of various political parties from Penisula Malaysia as well as Sabah and Sarawak. These political parties includes Democratic Action Party (DAP - 民主行动党)，Parti KeADILan Rakyat (PKR - 人民公正党), Parti Islam Se-malaysia (PAS - 回教党), etc etc.

Here is the poster of the Barisan Rakyat, which is competing against the ruling Barisan National (National Front - 国阵) party.

UPDATE: Barisan Rakyat has been officially renamed as Pakatan Rakyat (The People's Alliance- 民联).

Pakatan Rakyat is headed by Dato' Seri Anwar Ibrahim and under him there are three party president, who are Datin Seri Wan Azizah from Parti KeADILan Rakyat (PKR - 人民公正党), Lim Kit Siang from Democratic Action Party (DAP - 民主行动党) and Dato' Seri Hadi Awang from Parti Islam Se-malaysia (PAS - 回教党).

Pakatan Rakyat also controls five (5) states in Malaysia and a Federal Territory. They are:-

Kedah
Kelantan
Kuala Lumpur
Penang
Perak
Selangor
Sarawak (soon)

Election Commision Stooping Opposition from Speaking at Mass Media!!

2008-02-28T13:13:00.002+08:00

Here is the formal letter from the Malaysian Election Commission (SPR) to TV stations to stop opposition from speaking to the public throguh mass media.

FREEDOM of SPEECH?? DEMOCRATIC??

The Conspiracy Behind May 13, 1969....

2008-02-26T00:45:00.006+08:00

I believe most of you have heard of the May 13 incident, which is the Malaysian Riots of 1969.
However, have you really know the real story of this incident?

The official version of the 13th May 1969 riots puts the blame on the provocation by opposition parties after they had made significant gains in the 1969 general elections. However, there is little evidence to support this allegation.

The Alliance Racial Formula
The Alliance formula at Independence contained contradictions which exacerbated ethnic tensions right up to the general elections of 1969. The British colonial power had backed UMNO's demands for Malay "special privileges" while the anti-colonial nationalist movement was forced into a defensive position on Non-Malay's citizenship and cultural rights.

The post-colonial economy also provided the conditions for the rise of the state capitalist class which used Malay-centrism as its ideology to rally support among the Malay masses. During this period, social inequality was maintained and continued to be interpreted in communal terms.

The 1969 General Elections
The Malaysian 3rd General Election was held at the 13th of May 1969.

The opposition parties made an electoral pact not to split the votes even though they were at opposite ends of their respective communalist propaganda. The results of the 1969 General Elections shook the status quo, for it completely demolished the Alliance edifice that had stood unchallenged since Independence. UMNO lost 17 parliamentary seats mainly to Parti Islam, and won only 51; MCA won only 13 seats, conceding 20 to the opposition;
while MIC won only two out of the three allocated to the party.

At the state level, the results were even more surprising; Kelantan was again lost to Parti Islam; the Alliance was beaten in Penang and Perak; the seats were evenly distributed in the capital state of Selangor; while the Alliance managed only 13 out of 24 in Terengganu. The worst defeat was suffered by MCA, whose candidates won only in constituencies with a strong Malay representation.

There were certainly widespread discontent among the workers, farmers, middle classes as well as urban setters. The state's racially discriminatory policies only served to create further divisions among the people and the 1969 election result clearly reflected this growing polarisation.

Record of The Riots
The declassified documents from the Public Record Office and foreign correspondents' dispatches show that there was a plan in place to assemble young Malay hoodlums from all over Selangor at the residence of the Selangor's Menteri Besar's residence and that mischief was afoot. Once the rioting had started, the security forces did not keep order impartially but stood by while these hoodlums were allowed to burn and kill indiscriminately. Troops also fired indiscriminately into Chinese shop-houses and were partial in making arrest. Consequently, the casualties were preponderantly Chinese.

These documents also show that Razak was in complete control from the start of the riots and with emergency in place, had a free hand in planning the post-1969 political makeup with the backing of armed forces.

The worst racial rioting the country had ever experienced flared up in Kuala Lumpur on the evening of May 13, and within days, the official number of dead stood at 137, with more than 300 injured, hundreds of houses gutted and scores of vehicles burnt.

The actual figure of fatalities has been a matter of dispute but from the various sources garnered from the documents at the Public Record Office, London, we can see that the official statistics were grossly understated and the ethnic distribution of casualties disguised.

Foreign Assessments of The Regime Change
Documents declassified at the Public Record Office, London after the thirty-year secrecy rule also contain confidential memoranda written by the respective British High Commission officers in the West and East Malaysia, the British Cabinet Office, the Foreign and Commonwealth Office as well as the Ministry of Overseas Development.

They contain information gathered in the course of diplomatic meetings; private intelligence gathering by embassy staff; reports by British embassy personnel in other capitals around the world, notably Singapore, Indonesia, Thailand, China, Australia, New Zealand; choices selections of media coverage of the Malaysian riots of 1969.

Through a study on these documents, we get to know not only the reality behind the strongly censored official version of the events but also how the Malaysian riots were perceived by the officials in different capitals around the world. Together they build up a picture of disapproval by regional and other foreign capitals of the racial discrimination and slaughter of ethnic Chinese in the May 1969 events. The Indonesian regime was the only exception; indeed, we learn from the records that General Suharto was the only foreign leader to have sent a congratulatory note to the new Malaysian regime over the May 1969 affair.

In the BHC in Kuala Lumpur, the suspension of the Sarawak state elections was regretted since it was clear that this was part of the plan by the new regime in Kuala Lumpur to gain control political development in East Malaysia. We look at further documents showing how the arms lobby in Britain and Australia tried to justify giving military equipment to a country ruled by emergency decree and practicing racial discrimination. In the end, British pragmatism dictated that supporting the dominant Malay ruling party in Malaysia would serve British interest better. Dissenting British volunteers in the Volunteer Service Organisation (VSO) were given a tongue lashing for their "ignorance of racial favouritism in any racially mixed community".

The Thai press could clearly see through the racially discriminatory policies of the Malaysian regime and they were sure that the rioters of May 1969 had acted with a purpose. The views of Premier Lee Kuan Yew are always note worthy. In the records, we find that he still had hopes that the Tunku would continue to play a father figure role in the new set-up, but Razak had gone down in his esteem by playing the role of "an evil genius". The Chinese government in Beijing was more cautious since they probably did not want to create more anti-Chinese feelings in the region after the events of 1965 in Indonesia.

The New Malay Ruling Class
It is clear that the riots of May 1969 had led to the ascendant of the state capitalist class which controlled the National Operations Council. It was also evident that the old aristocratic class under the Tunku had been eclipsed by the new Malay elite under the leadership of Razak.

This new Malay ruling class largely maintained the Alliance formula but enlarged it to incorporate more opposition parties. However, the predominance of UNMO within its larger coalition was unmistakable. The racial bloodbath and the state of emergency under military rule was intended to serve as a deterrent to any challenge to UMNO's dominance of the post-1969 Malaysian political landscape.

The climate of terror and repression allowed the new regime to introduce and implement discriminatory Malay-centric economic, educational and cultural policies. These policies have been crucial in winning over the Malay masses to support the new Malay ruling class. At the same time, these discriminatory policies have been instrumental in facilitating the accumulation of capital by the new Malay capitalist class.

Toward National Reconciliation
Nearly forty years after this regrettable May 13 incident in Malaysia, little effort has been made by the authorities to work towards national reconciliation. The National Operation Council did not hold any open inquiry into the incident and the causes of the post-election disturbances.

The Alliance government rejected as unfounded and malicious the accounts of foreign correspondents as to the nature of the bloodbath which occurred even though its own statistics by race on deaths and arrests support those accounts generally.

Since then, UMNO leaders have periodically used the May 13 incident as a threat to would-be dissidents who try to argue for civil rights and even to deter any attempts by voters to vote for the Opposition. We also have witnessed several episodes since 1969 where mobs orchestrated by UMNO have defied the law to harass and threaten Malaysians who question the denial of their civil rights. The connivance of the police and security forces was particularly suspect in the APCET II episode in 1996 and the Kampung Medan incident in 2001.

UMNO leaders have since insisted that Malaysians must agree not to discuss publicly "subjects already enshrined in the Constitution", and indicated that these forbidden subjects include race, religion, language and the status of the sultans and their families.

The UMNO general assembly in November 2006 has been no exception to a practice in these assemblies where veiled threats are issued and keris (Malay daggers) are unsheathed. In the assembly, a delegate even egged on the UMNO Youth leader (who happened to be also a government minister) by asking when he was going to use the unsheathed keris, a clear incitement to violence and murder.

MORE COMING SOON....

Just Change - DAP 2008 Election Campaign Song

2008-02-22T04:03:00.004+08:00

Please spread these videos around as they cannot make it into the main media. Thank you.

English Version
Just Change - DAP 2008 Election Campaign Song

中文版
改变 - 民主行动党全国大选竞选主题曲

Versi Bahasa Melayu
Berubah - Lagu Kempen Pilihanraya DAP

"If you cannot fight rape, better lay down & enjoy it!" -- BN

2008-02-16T21:46:00.006+08:00

JUST CIRCULATE THIS, PEOPLE. LET'S EDUCATE EVERYONE

This message is to provoke your mind to think whether you want the status quo to be perpetuated. If you want to do your bit to effect a chan ge for the better, think well before you vote at the next general election.

Chances are that the B N will still win but we need to send the proper signal to Pak Lah that enough is enough....

Below is the result of extreme discriminations and marginalization by the BN govt for too many years. Let's keep circulating this esp before the next election.

And today this is what happened in Malaysia racism.

These lists cover a period of about 49 years since Independence Day in Malaysia (1957):

(1) Out of all the 5 major banks in Malaysia, only one bank is own by multi-racial, the rest are controlled by Malays.

(2) 99% of Petronas (the only one petroleum company) directors are Malays, and the former Prime Minister work as Consultant in Petronas.

(3) 3% of Petronas employees are Chinese.

(4) 99% of 2000 Petronas gasoline stations are owned by Malays.

(5) 100% all contractors working under Petronas projects must be "bumi's status" (Malay).

(6) 0% of non-Malays staffs are legally required in Malay's companies. But there must be 30% Malays staffs in Chinese companies and shareholder. Which this mean non-Malays own company needs to give their property to Malays. An d n on-Malays citizen can't really own their business.

(7) 5% of all new intake for government police, nurses, army, is non-Malays.

(8) 2% is the present Chinese staff in Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF), drop from 40% in 1960.

(9) 2% is the percentage of non-Malays government servants in Putrajaya ( Malaysia main government office). But Malays make up 98%.

(10) 7% is the percentage of Chinese government servants in the whole government (in 2004), drop from 30% in 1960. Only 2 position for non-Malays in political status.

(11) 95% of government contracts are given to Malays; even it is an open tender. Non-Malays contractors tender the lower price and use better materials can't get the contract that government given.

(12) 100% all business licenses are controlled by Malay government e.g . Taxi permits, Approved permits, etc. and all the license are given to government officer families.

(13) 80% of the Chinese rice millers in Kedah (north of peninsular Malaysia had to be sold to Malay and controlled by Bernas (Government Org.) since 1980s. Otherwise, life is make difficult for Chinese rice millers.

(14) 100 big companies set up, owned and managed by Chinese Malaysians were taken over by government, and later managed by Malays since 1970's e.g. UTC, UMBC, MISC, etc. This company now is the sole company.

(15) At least 10 Chinese owned bus companies (throughout Malaysia,throughout 40 years) had to be sold to MARA or other Malay transport companies due to rejection by Malay authority to Chinese application for bus routes and rejection for their application for new buses.

(16) 2 Chinese taxi drivers were barred from driving in Johor (South of Peninsular Malaysia ) Larkin bus station. There are about 30 taxi drivers and 3 are Chinese in October 2004. Spoiling taxi club properties was the reason given.

(17) 0 non-Malays are allowed to get shop lots in the new Muar (city in south peninsular Malaysia ) bus station (November 2004).

(18) 8000 billions ringgit is the total amount the government chan neled to Malays pockets through ASB, ASN, MARA, privatization of government agencies like Tabung Haji etc, through NEP over 34 years periods.

(19) 48 Chinese primary schools closed down since 1968 â¤" 2000

(20) 144 Tamil primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000

(21) 2637 Malay primary schools built since 1968 - 2000

(22) 2.5% is government budget for Chinese primary schools. Tamil schools got only 1%, Malay schools got 96.5%

(23) While a Chinese parent with RM1000 salary (monthly) cannot get school-text-book-loan, and a Malay parent with RM2000 salary is eligible.

(24) 10 all public universities vice chan cellors are Malays. And politics in universities are held by Malays. If non-Malays want to form a politics parties, there is no way to get approved. (25) 5% - the government universities lecturers of non-Malay origins had been reduced from about 70% in 1965 to only 5% in 2004 with the reason Malaysia Education Ministry give full support for Malays only.

(26) Only 5% is given to non-Malays for government scholarships over 40 years.

(27) 0 Chinese or Indians were sent to Japan and Korea under "Look East Policy".

(28) 128 STPM (High Study / A Level) Chinese top students coul d n ot get into the course that they aspired i.e. Medicine and doctors (in 2004). Malays with not qualify result can get into the course.

(29) 10% place for non-bumi students for MARA science schools beginning from year 2003, but only 7% are filled. Before that it was 100% Malays.

(30) 50 cases whereby Chinese and Indian Malaysians, are beaten up in the National Service program since 2003.

(31) 25% is Malaysian Chinese population in 2004, drop from 45% since 1957 because government are not support non-Malays like government support Malays.

(32) 7% is the present Malaysian Indians population (2004), a drop from 12% since 1957.

(33) 2 millions Chinese Malaysians had emigrated to overseas since 40 years ago due to unfair politics.

(34) 0.5 million Indians Malaysians had emigrated to overseas.

(35) 3 millions Indonesians had migrated into Malaysia and became malaysian citizens with bumi's status.

(36) 600000 are the Chinese and Indians Malaysians with "red I/C" (a temporary identity card) and were rejected repeatedly when applying for citizenship for 40 years. Perhaps 60% of them had already passed away due to old age. This shows racism of how easily Indonesians got their citizenships compare with the Chinese and Indians

(37) 5% - 15% discount for a Malay to buy a house, regardless whether the Malay is rich or poor

(38) 2% is what Chinese new villages get compare with 98% of what Malays villages got for rural development budget..

(39) 50 roa d n ames (at least) had been chan ge from Chinese names to other names.

(40) 1 Dewan Gan Boon Le ong (in Malacca) was altered to other name ( e.g.Dewan Serbaguna or sort) when it was being officially used for a few days. Government tries to shun Chinese names. This racism happened in around year 2000 or sort.

(41) 0 temples/churches were built for each housing estate. But every housing estate MUST got at least one mosque/surau built.

(42) 3000 mosques/surau were built in all housing estates throughout Malaysia since 1970 with full government support. No temples, no churches are built in housing estates that supported by government.

(43) 1 Catholic Church in Shah Alam took 20 years to apply to be constructed. But told by Malay authority that it must look like a factory and can't look like a church. Still not yet approved since 2004.

(44) 1 publishing of Bible in Iban language banned (in 2002)

(45) 0 of the government TV stations (RTM1, RTM2, and TV3) have directors of non-Malays origin.

(46) 30 government produced TV dramas and films always showed that the bad guys had Chinese face, and the good guys had Malay face. You can check it out since 1970s. Recent years, this tendency becomes less.

(47) 10 times, at least, Malays (especially Umno) had threatened to massacre the Chinese Malaysians using May 13 since 1969.

(48) 20 constituencies won by DAP woul d n ot get funds from the government to develop. Or these Chinese majority constituencies would be the last to be developed

(49) 100 constituencies (parliaments and states) had been racist re-delineated so Chinese voters were diluted that Chinese candidates, particularly DAP candidates lost in election since 1970s

(50) Only 3 out of 12 human rights items are ratified by Malaysia government since 1960

(51) 0 elimination of, all forms of racial discrimination (UN Human Rights)is not ratified by Malaysia government since 1960s

(52) 20 reported cases whereby Malay ambulance attendance treated Chinese patients inhumanely, and Malay government hospital staffs purposely delay attending to Chinese patients in 2003. Unreported cases may be 200

(53) 50 cases each year whereby Chinese, especially Chinese youths being beaten up by Malay youths in public places. We may check at police reports provided the police took the report, otherwise there will be no record

(54) 20 cases every year whereby Chinese drivers who accidentally knocked down Malays were seriously assaulted or killed by Malays

(55) 12% is what ASB/ASN (Malays Own banks) got per annum while banks fixed deposit is only about 3.5% per annum.

And more cases haven't been discovered.

So please circulate this, and let's fight for changes. Together we can ensure a better future for every Malaysians.

Thank you.

Lawak Potong Zakar! Haha!

2008-01-26T22:29:00.000+08:00

I bumped into this funny joke somewhere and would like to share it with you guys. ;)
The joke is in BM. Must read till the end k! :D

apek: itu potong zaka ada bagut ka ?
ali : manyak bagut..bila lu potong haa lu punya barang manyak bersih loo..

apek:?!! err..saya kawan ada cakap,potong zaka aaahh.. manyak ploblem..
ali : apa probrem ?

apek:manyak buang lui..lagi aahh..dia punya performance tatak bagut.. manyak cinang semputloh..
ali : cehh.. apek, lu apa celita.. saya suda lama potong.. tada apa problem.. bini saya manyak puas woo..

apek:lu mini puas sama itu potong zaka ka?
ali : ya la.. bila lu potong aahh.. lagi sedap maen woo..lu lagi lambat pancut..

apek:???!!! err..lu punya 1.3 atau 1.5 ??
ali : ??!! woi apek cakap baik2 sikit ha.. saya punya 6 incila..

apek:??! tiu nia ma.. lu jgn maen2 haa.. mana ada potong zaka 6 inci..
ali : cilaka apek ni..nah tengok ( bukak sluar tunjuk pale butoh..)

apek: chee sin punya olang..gua tanya baik2 lu tunjuk lu punya lancau..
ali : abis.. lu tarak percaya..saya tunjuk la..

apek: saya tatak tanya sama lu punya lancau..
saya tanya lu pasal itu nasional car.. potong zaka.. molo punya olang..
ali : aiya.. apek.. lain kali lu sebut betul2 la..kasi susa saja..
bukan potong zaka la.. proton saga.. cinabeng btulla..

Malaysin Chinese & Indian, WAKE UP!!!

2008-01-18T12:36:00.000+08:00

This message is to provoke your mind to think whether you want the status
quo to be perpetuated. If you want to do your bit to effect a change for
the better, think well before you vote at the next general election.

Chances are that the B N will still win but we need to send the proper
signal to Pak Lah that enough is enough....

Below is the result of extreme discriminations and marginalization by the
BN govt for too many years. Let's keep circulating this esp before the next
election.

And today this is what happened in Malaysia racism.

These lists cover a period of about 49 years since Independence Day in
Malaysia (1957):

( 1) Out of all the 5 major banks in Malaysia, only one bank is own by
multi-racial, the rest are controlled by Malays.

(2) 99% of Petronas (the only one petroleum company) directors are Malays,
and the former Prime Minister work as Consultant in Petronas.

(3) 3% of Petronas employees are Chinese.

(4) 99% of 2000 Petronas gasoline stations are owned by Malays.

(5) 100% all contractors working under Petronas projects must be "bumi's
status" (Malay).

(6) 0% of non-Malays staffs are legally required in Malay's companies. But
there must be 30% Malays staffs in Chinese companies and shareholder. Which
this mean non-Malays own company needs to give their property to Malays.
And non-Malays citizen can't really own their business.

(7) 5% of all new intake for government police, nurses, army, is
non-Malays.

(8) 2% is the present Chinese staff in Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF),
drop from 40% in 1960.

(9) 2% is the percentage of non-Malays government servants in Putrajaya (
Malaysia main government office). But Malays make up 98%.

(10) 7% is the percentage of Chinese government servants in the whole
government (in 2004), drop from 30% in 1960. Only 2 position for non-Malays
in political status.

(11) 95% of government contracts are given to Malays; even it is an open
tender. Non-Malays contractors tender the lower price and use better
materials can't get the contract that government given.

(12) 100% all business licenses are controlled by Malay government e.g.
Taxi permits, Approved permits, etc. and all the license are given to
government officer families.

(13) 80% of the Chinese rice millers in Kedah (north of peninsular Malaysia
had to be sold to Malay and controlled by Bernas (Government Org.) since
1980s. Otherwise, life is make difficult for Chinese rice millers.

(14) 100 big companies set up, owned and managed by Chinese Malaysians were
taken over by government, and later managed by Malays since 1970's e.g.
UTC, UMBC, MISC, etc. This company now is the sole company.

(15) At least 10 Chinese owned bus companies (throughout
Malaysia,throughout 40 years) had to be sold to MARA or other Malay
transport companies due to rejection by Malay authority to Chinese
application for bus routes and rejection for their application for new
buses.

(16) 2 Chinese taxi drivers were barred from driving in Johor (South of
Peninsular Malaysia ) Larkin bus station. There are about 30 taxi drivers
and 3 are Chinese in October 2004. Spoiling taxi club properties was the
reason given.

(17) 0 non-Malays are allowed to get shop lots in the new Muar (city in
south peninsular Malaysia ) bus station (November 2004).

(18) 8000 billions ringgit is the total amount the government channeled to
Malays pockets through ASB, ASN, MARA, privatization of government agencies
like Tabung Haji etc, through NEP over 34 years periods.

(19) 48 Chinese primary schools closed down since 1968 â¤" 2000

(20) 144 Tamil primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000

(21) 2637 Malay primary schools built since 1968 - 2000

(22) 2.5% is government budget for Chinese primary schools. Tamil schools
got only 1%, Malay schools got 96.5%

(23) While a Chinese parent with RM1000 salary (monthly) cannot get
school-text-book-loan, and a Malay parent with RM2000 salary is eligible.

(24) 10 all public universities vice chancellors are Malays. And politics
in universities are held by Malays. If non-Malays want to form a politics
parties, there is no way to get approved.

(25) 5% - the government universities lecturers of non-Malay origins had
been reduced from about 70% in 1965 to only 5% in 2004 with the reason
Malaysia Education Ministry give full support for Malays only.

(26) Only 5% is given to non-Malays for government scholarships over 40
years.

(27) 0 Chinese or Indians were sent to Japan and Korea under "Look East
Policy".

(28) 128 STPM (High Study / A Level) Chinese top students could not get
into the course that they aspired i.e. Medicine and doctors (in 2004).
Malays with not qualify result can get into the course.

(29) 10% place for non-bumi students for MARA science schools beginning
from year 2003, but only 7% are filled. Before that it was 100% Malays.

(30) 50 cases whereby Chinese and Indian Malaysians, are beaten up in the
National Service program since 2003.

(31) 25% is Malaysian Chinese population in 2004, drop from 45% since 1957
because government are not support non-Malays like government support
Malays.

(32) 7% is the present Malaysian Indians population (2004), a drop from 12%
since 1957.

(33) 2 millions Chinese Malaysians had emigrated to overseas since 40 years
ago due to unfair politics.

(34) 0.5 million Indians Malaysians had emigrated to overseas.

(35) 3 millions Indonesians had migrated into Malaysia and became malaysian
citizens with bumi's status.

(36) 600000 are the Chinese and Indians Malaysians with "red I/C" (a
temporary identity card) and were rejected repeatedly when applying for
citizenship for 40 years. Perhaps 60% of them had already passed away due
to old age. This shows racism of how easily Indonesians got their
citizenships compare with the Chinese and Indians

(37) 5% - 15% discount for a Malay to buy a house, regardless whether the
Malay is rich or poor

(38) 2% is what Chinese new villages get compare with 98% of what Malays
villages got for rural development budget..

(39) 50 road names (at least) had been change from Chinese names to other
names.

(40) 1 Dewan Gan Boon Leong (in Malacca) was altered to other name (
e.g.Dewan Serbaguna or sort) when it was being officially used for a few
days. Government tries to shun Chinese names. This racism happened in
around year 2000 or sort.

(41) 0 temples/churches were built for each housing estate. But every
housing estate MUST got at least one mosque/surau built.

(42) 3000 mosques/surau were built in all housing estates throughout
Malaysia since 1970 with full government support. No temples, no churches
are built in housing estates that supported by government.

(43) 1 Catholic Church in Shah Alam took 20 years to apply to be
constructed. But told by Malay authority that it must look like a factory
and can't look like a church. Still not yet approved since 2004.

(44) 1 publishing of Bible in Iban language banned (in 2002)

(45) 0 of the government TV stations (RTM1, RTM2, and TV3) have directors
of non-Malays origin.

(46) 30 government produced TV dramas and films always showed that the bad
guys had Chinese face, and the good guys had Malay face. You can check it
out since 1970s. Recent years, this tendency becomes less.

(47) 10 times, at least, Malays (especially Umno) had threatened to
massacre the Chinese Malaysians using May 13 since 1969.

(48) 20 constituencies won by DAP would not get funds from the government
to develop. Or these Chinese majority constituencies would be the last to
be developed

(49) 100 constituencies (parliaments and states) had been racist
re-delineated so Chinese voters were diluted that Chinese candidates,
particularly DAP candidates lost in election since 1970s

(50) Only 3 out of 12 human rights items are ratified by Malaysia
government since 1960

(51) 0 elimination of, all forms of racial discrimination (UN Human
Rights)is not ratified by Malaysia government since 1960s

(52) 20 reported cases whereby Malay ambulance attendance treated Chinese
patients inhumanely, and Malay government hospital staffs purposely delay
attending to Chinese patients in 2003. Unreported cases may be 200

(53) 50 cases each year whereby Chinese, especially Chinese youths being
beaten up by Malay youths in public places. We may check at police reports
provided the police took the report, otherwise there will be no record

(54) 20 cases every year whereby Chinese drivers who accidentally knocked
down Malays were seriously assaulted or killed by Malays

(55) 12% is what ASB/ASN (Malays Own banks) got per annum while banks fixed
deposit is only about 3.5% per annum.

And more cases haven't been discovered.

Don't Forget when You are in China!

2008-01-05T20:50:00.000+08:00

A man went on a business to China and wanted to buy some gifts for his kids. He went to a shop and found a nice looking CD player.

Wary of buying inferior goods, he asked the shopkeeper, 'What would happened if this does not work?'

The shopkeeper quietly points to the only sign in English that reads:

'GUARANTEE NO SPOILT'

Feeling assured, he paid for the CD player and returns to his hotel. He tried to use the CD player after returning to the hotel but it would not even switch on.

He quickly return to the shop and asked for a refund or an exchange for another unit. When the shopkeeper refused to give either, the man points to the sign assuring him of a guarantee.

The shopkeeper then said, 'Brother, you are in China . We read from the right to the left.'

Malaysian health minister quits over sex video

2008-01-03T01:20:00.000+08:00

PUTRAJAYA, Malaysia (Reuters) - Malaysia's health minister resigned on Wednesday, a day after he shocked the nation by admitting he was the man in a widely circulated sex video.

Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi said he had accepted the resignation of Health Minister Chua Soi Lek, who apologized after two lengthy DVDs hit the streets showing him engaging in sexual acts with an unidentified woman.

The scandal is the latest in a series of problems plaguing Abdullah's government, which has been widely expected to call a snap election in the coming weeks.

"After I made my confession, I had hoped Malaysians would be able to accept my apology," he said. "Unfortunately, from the feedback I received, I observed that Malaysians cannot accept it."

"Some Malaysians have a holier-than-thou attitude," Chua, a doctor by training, told a packed news conference at his office. "At the end of the day, it just tells you that honesty sometimes does not pay."

Chua, who said the woman was a "personal friend", had insisted on Tuesday he would not resign over the issue, drawing a sharp rebuke from people within and outside government.

The New Straits Times, controlled by Abdullah's ruling party, said in a commentary Chua should quit to save the government from further anguish.

Abdullah, a devout Muslim, won a record mandate in 2004 polls on a pledge to clean up the government and fight corruption.

"For a top politician you can't continue in power when you are seen naked," said political analyst Ooi Kee Beng.

ABDULLAH'S HEADACHES

The prime minister said he had been shocked by the news but stressed that the episode was unlikely to undermine his coalition's election preparations.

"He (Chua) has taken responsibility over what had happened. I feel it was an appropriate decision taken by him," he said, adding that Chua's position would be filled later.

Chua, a father of three, said he did not make the DVDs. Newspapers said they were closed-circuit recordings made two years ago in a hotel room. One DVD lasted 56 minutes and the other 44 minutes.

Police were probing the case, trying to establish who made the recordings and how four cameras came to be in the room of a hotel in the southern state of Johor, the New Straits Times said.

Abdullah's four-year-old administration has been beset with major problems lately, a sign he may be forced to delay elections beyond March, when many had expected them to take place.

In late November, more than 10,000 ethnic Indians took to the streets in an unprecedented protest over racial discrimination.

More info HERE.

The Exotic Frog

2007-12-24T01:42:00.000+08:00

A blonde goes to her local pet store in search of an 'exotic' pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box FULL of live frogs. The sign says:

"SEX FROGS"
"Only $20 each!"
"Comes with 'complete' instructions."

The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's watching her. She whispers softly to the man behind the counter, "I'll TAKE one!"

As the man packages the frog, he quietly says to her, "Just follow the instructions!"
The blonde nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her way home.

As soon as she closes the door to her apartment, she opens the instructions and reads them very carefully. She does EXACTLY what is specified:

1. Take a shower.
2. Splash on some nice perfume.
3. Slip into a very sexy nightie.
4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down beside you, and allow the frog to do what he has been trained to do.

She then quickly gets into bed with the frog and to her surprise . . NOTHING happens! The blonde is very disappointed and quite upset at this point. She re-reads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, "If you have any problems or questions ... please call the pet store."

So, she calls the pet store. The man says, "I'll be right over."

Within minutes, the man is ringing her doorbell.

The blonde welcomes him in and says, "See, I've done everything according to the instructions. The damn frog just SITS there!"

The man . . . looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares 'directly into its eyes' and STERNLY says:

"LISTEN TO ME!! I'm only going to show you how to do this ONE ... MORE ... TIME!!!"

Impact of Job Change - Joke

2007-12-24T01:41:00.000+08:00

A taxi passenger tapped the driver on the shoulder to
ask him a question. The driver screamed, lost
control of the car, nearly hit a bus, went up on the
footpath, and stopped few centimeters from a shop
window.

For a second everything went quiet in the cab, and
then the driver said: "Look mate, don't ever do that
again. You scared the daylights out of me!".

The passenger apologized and said, "I didn't realize
that a little tap would scare you so much." The
driver replied, "Sorry, it's not really your fault.

Today is my first day as a cab driver - I've been
driving a van carrying dead Bodies for the last 25
years...

Gorgeous Model. Can you believe SHE was a HE?

2007-12-24T00:31:00.000+08:00

This gorgeous model from China was a HE. Can you believe it?? Check out the pics below. ;)

So what do you think?? :)

Joke on Password

2007-12-24T00:26:00.000+08:00

A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, she told him that he would now need to enter a password. Something he could remember easily and will use each time he has to log on.

The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try for the shock effect
to bring this to his Wife's' attention.

So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife that he was keying in.... P... E... N...I...S...

His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:

**PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH**

Red Head

2007-12-24T00:24:00.000+08:00

AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.

"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."

The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left breast and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed in even more.

She pushed her knee and screamed; likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed.
Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?

"Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."

Malaysian Judiciary Scandal - FULL VERSION!

2007-12-15T18:50:00.000+08:00

This is the full version (14 minute) of the Malaysian Judiciary Scandal.
Transcript is available below.

Full Transcript:

(Parts are slightly inaudible. This transcript may not be entirely accurate.)

Lingam: The CJ (Chief Justice - judiciary’s No 1 post) said his relative is now the Agong, so he wants to stay on to 68, so, Tengku Adnan said - I told Tengku Adnan, yesterday I had a meeting with him - he said PM is already very angry with him … and … he said no problem, he is going to make you acting err… confirm your position as PCA (President of Court of Appeal – judiciary’s No 2), working very hard, and then get Tan Sri Mokhtar as CJM (Chief Judge of Malaya – judiciary’s No 3).

Ah, so we just keep it confidential. I am working very hard on it. Then there is a letter, according to Tengku - I am going to see him tomorrow - there is a letter sent to … ah … CJ - I mean Tan Sri Dzaiddin - that Datuk Heliliah, …er Datuk Ramli and Datuk Maarop be made judges, and he rejected that Dr Andrew Chew and apa itu Zainudin Ismail lah because Zainuddin Ismail who condemned your appointment and Tan Sri Mohtar’s appointment.

And then you also, it seems, wrote a letter for the remaining … confirmed as judges. As per our memo, I discussed with Tun Eusoff Chin and we sent the same memo to PM. I just want to get a copy letter that this has been done.

And then Tan Sri Dzaiddin said he is going to recommend six people for the Court of Appeal, but until today the letter hasn’t come to PM. He never discussed, but neither he has sent the letter to PM. He has not sent. So, I know it is under the constitution, for judges all, that is your job, Datuk, to send, but we don’t want to make it an issue now.

Ah, okay. Actually I told Tengku Adnan to inform PM, PM to call you for a meeting. But I will organise this so that Tengku Adnan will call you directly. And then I got your number, I will tell him to call you directly to for you to meet PM lah. Ah… So should be okay, then ar… correct, correct, it is very important that the key players must be there.

Correct, correct, correct. Correct, correct. You know that the same problem that Tun Eusoff Chin had. He tried to do all this and yet he has run out of soldiers. He couldn’t do it because many were from the other camp. Last time was unfortunate because Tun Daim was doing everything sabotaging, you know lah…

Otherwise how are things with you - everything is okay? No, don’t worry. You know sometimes Tan Sri Vincent said that half the time we are talking about judiciary rather than doing the work. But if I don’t do this part, my work will be useless. Ha! Ha! Ha!

Ah, yes. Correct, correct, correct, correct, correct. Right, right, right. Correct. Ah. Ah. Right! Susah. You see he has now asked for six Court of Appeal judges, so that he can put his men before he retires.

Correct, correct, correct, ah, and then, ah, ah, correct, correct, correct, correct, correct.

Ah, never mind, I will do this, I will get er… Tengku Adnan to arrange for PM to call you and Tan Sri Vincent Tan for PM to call. You know why, actually, I am very grateful to Tan Sri Vincent Tan, You know why? I brainwashed him so much I even quarreled with him.

One day I went to Vincent Tan’s house, I fired him at night in his house. I said bloody hell, if you don’t do this who will do it? All these people, Tun Eusoff Chin, Datuk Ahmad Fairuz, Tan Sri Zainal all fought for …that. Then he called Tengku Adnan. Tengku Adnan he said, saya bukan Perdana Menteri Malaysia lah, you know. If the old man doesn’t want to listen to me, go to hell.

He quarreled with me. I said never mind, never mind, Tan Sri, you talk to PM again tomorrow morning to put Datuk Ahmad Fairuz to CJM. So next day morning he went and he called me back 9.30 that he said PM has already agreed. So I said never mind, we hope for the best. So I said no harm trying, the worst that it can happen is you lose.

Being the old man, he is 76 years old, he gets whispers everywhere, and then you don’t whisper, he get taken away by the other side. But, now the PM is very alert because every time he gets letters from Tan Sri Dzaiddin, he calls Tengku Adnan, he says discuss with Vincent, come and discuss. And…

Yes, yes, ya. Correct, correct. Ya, but you see although I know PM, but my views … I am a lawyer in practice… my views are… I go through them, I go through them lah.

Ah. Ah. Ah. Ah.

And then Dzaiddin will go and tell them you went and saw PM and make a big issue out of it. Oh ya, I think so, I think so.

Okay, fine, fine, fine, fine. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Right, okay, okay. Ah. Ah. Correct, correct.

Now I heard Raja Aziz, Raja Aziz ah, two weeks ago spoke to my lawyer Thayalan, and another lawyer Anad, in the High Court - they have a case with each other. So, Thayalan and Anad asked Raja Aziz, how is Tan Sri Wan Adnan?

He said he is on his way down. But you know what is the shocking thing he said? Datuk Fairuz became CJM. He overruled everybody, in three months time, he is going to be PCA, and six months time, he is going to be CJ. He said I can’t take this shock. He told lah. Ha!

It seems ah that they are going to organise a campaign … they are going to organise a campaign to run you down. But you just keep quiet - don’t say anything. Don’t … even the press ask, you said I leave it to God, that’s all. Don’t say. I really like your message. You said I work very hard, what can I do? I leave it to God. That’s the best answer, Datuk, that you can ever give. Ah.

Yes… I will also get Tan Sri to remind PM to put a Tan Sri ship this year lah. You know, this will elevate you, you know.

Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes. Ah. Steve Shim got so fast, Tan Sri Chong waited for a whole year to get Tan Sriship.

Ah. My God, that’s why, ah. Correct, correct, correct, correct, ya, ya, ya, ya, right, right, right, correct, correct.

Don’t worry, we organise this. And if Tan Sri Vincent and Tengku Adnan want to meet you privately, they will, I will call you. We organise a private arrangement, in a very neutral place.

No, don’t worry, Datuk, I know how much you suffered for Tun Eusoff Chin. And Tun said Datuk Ahmad Fairuz 110 percent loyalty. We want to make sure our friends are there for the sake of PM and for the sake of the country. Not for our own interest, not for our own interest. We want to make sure the country comes out well.

Well, you suffered so much, so much you have done - for the election petition, Wee Choo Keong, everything. How much, nobody would have done all these.

Yes, you know. Ah. Good lah. You don’t worry. I am constantly working on this. I…

Ya, ya, don’t worry, don’t worry. We work hard on this er Datuk. And if Tan Sri Vincent and Tengku want to see you, I will organise it in a confidential place.

Okay, Datuk, all the very best. God bless you and your family.

Okay. Thank you, thank you. Bye-bye, bye-bye.

[Off Camera Voice]: Who is that Dato?

Lingam: Chief Justice Malaya.

[Off Camera Voice]: Who is that?

Lingam: Dato Ahmad Fairuz

[Off camera voice]: Oh Ahmad Fairuz.

Lingam: I put him up there. Don’t tell this, please. I cannot tell this to Manjit. And he is acting President Court of Appeals Number 2 post. He is next Chief Justice. He always says “I leave it to you.”

[Off Camera Voice]: I thought you were very close to Tun Eusoff Chin, Datuk?

Lingam: He is Eusoff Chin’s man, Eusoff Chin retired. But Dzaiddin hates Eusoff Chin, you understand? Ah..

[Off Camera Voice]: Because you know I…I…I..as far as I know you are very…

Lingam: Eusoff Chin and I are extremely close. Because you know…Yeah. Eusoff Chin in power, I can straight and get in Pom! Pom! Pom! Pom! But now Dzaiddin is there. So Dzaiddin is attacking our cases. That means what? James Kumar is aligned to Dzaiddin. But Dzaiddin is retiring in 15th of September. He is finished.

[Off camera voice]: Next year?

Lingam: So Dzaiddin really wants to go…Don’t worry. Dzaiddin recommended Malik Ahmad to be Chief Judge of Malaya. But we went and “cut” “cut” cut” cut” I and Tengku Adnan and Vincent told PM. I stop him for now, because he is anti-PM. We put Fairuz in. And we put…I told you three months ago he became CJM [Chief Justice Malaya]. He said “Don’t believe.” Then he got it. He rang up to thank me. And all that. He now acting PCA because Wan Adnan is sick. Right? This. Apart from law knowledge you need kow tow. Please understand that. You need to know the emperor. Knowing the law doesn’t give you

the winning formula, you must also kow tow to the emperor. Correct or not? So now I am working very hard. So he agreed to meet Vincent Tan and PM and…what you call Tengku Adnan.

[Off camera voice]: Do you think Vincent has an interest over PM?

Lingam: You don’t know about the history. Businesswise may not be successful. Robert Kuok is very brilliant. Lim Goh Tong is very rich. Vincent Tan, you know what PM say? He went to Averton he went to Langkawi. He said bincang. I want you to build a hotel here. His wife pulled him away. [Inaudible] He said Dato Seri I will think about it. The wife pulled him away. There is another [inaudible] cannot get a bank loan. Vincent there. Vincent, can you build a hotel? Ready for next Air show?

I want you do it in 6 months. `Datuk Seri, Don’t worry, I will get it done.’ He paid double the price to get all of them. A big loss lah. Then Solomon Island and Fiji and all, he said, Vincent go and invest there, he went and bought…[inaudible] the government factory [inaudible] you do this project a bit and cover up your loss. PM will do what he want to do to cover your backside.

[Off camera voice]: Vincent is very close to him.

Lingam: That’s right. Don’t ask… because Vincent has taken me to PM’s residence… the house … [inaudible]… Anwar’s case… the lawyers…Wee Cheong … [inaudible]. But I cannot go and talk to PM just like that and say promote this and that…

Because ah, he knows… I am a… but when PM calls me on Anwar’s case, I can tell him… he’ll listen…But if I go promote so and so, that means I got interest. So, I don’t do that. I use Vincent and Tengku, go and do that. I don’t f*** them up. They go

and do that. But I tell you this lah. Don’t tell in front of people, of course. Life, one thing go confidential wrong is dangerous. Ah. Never, never say…You should… never. Even though to PM. You should never say. I don’t know. I always say “I don’t know.” That’s all.

[Off camera voice]: Everybody… I think many people know. Even the son case, everything I talk the father, …. Talk until he agreed.

Lingam: You know me [inaudible]. But I never talk about it. Even the son’s case, I do everything. I talk to the father…Talk until he agreed. But if it is a big crisis that affects him, ….I can talk, he will listen. But if I want to favour somebody, that I cannot guarantee. Because my interest is not his interest. You know what I mean. Tomorrow invest your interest involving your father, I can come say this this this, you will listen. But tomorrow I appeal for me, you are not obliged to listen. Because you are a politician, PM. Politician is what is your interest, not what is my interest. But if I am giving advise on your interest, you will listen. On my interest, you will not. You must be careful about this.

[Off camera voice]: Datuk, I need to ask you this question.

Lingam: Ask me. Ask me.

[Off camera voice]: For a while now…

Lingam: Because we can talk behind these people.

[Off camera voice]… Actually, I think, you know, Daim has more equity interest in Berjaya than Vincent Tan, isn’t that true?

Lingam: Let me tell you something … [inaudible] was bought by Daim … [inaudible]. Later on he did some deals where Daim supposed to help him. One or two he helped. Supposed to give him some money. Didn’t give. Part was paid, part not paid. Later on Daim called up and he got paid.

How To Poison Your Mother-In-Law

2007-12-06T13:00:00.000+08:00

A long time ago in China, a girl named Li-Li got married and went to
live with her husband and mother-in-law.

In a very short time, Li-Li found that she couldn't get along at all
with her mother-in-law.

Their personalities were very different, and Li-Li was angered by many
of her mother-in-law's habits. In addition, the mother-in-law criticized
Li-Li constantly.

Days passed, and weeks passed. Li-Li and her mother-in-law never stopped
arguing and fighting. But what made the situation even worse was that,
according to ancient Chinese tradition, Li-Li had to bow to her
mother-in-law and obey her every wish. All the anger and unhappinessin
the house was causing Li-Li's poor husband great distress.

Finally, Li-Li could not stand her mother-in-law's bad temper and
dictatorship any longer, and she decided to do something about it.

Li-Li went to see her father's good friend, Mr Huang, who sold herbs.
She told him the situation and asked if he would give her some poison so
that she could solve the problem once and for all.

Mr Huang thought for awhile, and finally said, "Li-Li, I will help you
solve your problem, but you must listen to me and obey what I tell you."

Li-Li said, "Yes, Mr Huang, I will do whatever you tell me to do".

Mr. Huang went into the back room, and returned in a few minutes with a
package of herbs.

He told Li-Li, "You can't use a quick-acting poison to get rid of
yourmother-in-law, because that would cause people to become suspicious.
Therefore, I have given you a number of herbs that will slowly build up
poison in her body. Every other day prepare some delicious meal and put
a little of these herbs in her serving.
Now, in order to make sure that nobody suspects you when she dies, you
must be very careful to act very friendly towards her. Don't argue with
her, obey her every wish, and treat her like a queen".

Li-Li was so happy. She thanked Mr Huang and hurried home to start her
plot of murdering her mother-in-law.

Weeks went by, and months went by, and every other day, Li-Li served the
specially treated food to her mother-in-law. She remembered what Mr
Huang had said about avoiding suspicion, so she controlled her temper,
obeyed her mother-in-law, and treated her like her own mother.

After six months had passed, the whole household had changed. Li-Li had
practised controlling her temper so much that she found that she al!
most never got mad or upset. She hadn't had an argument with her
mother-in-law in six months because she now seemed much kinder and
easier to get along with.

The mother-in-law' s attitude toward Li-Li changed, and she began to
love Li-Li like her own daughter. She kept telling friends and relatives
that Li-Li was the best daughter-in- law one could ever find.

Li-Li and her mother-in-law were now treating each other like a real
mother and daughter.

Li-Li's husband was very happy to see what was happening.

One day, Li-Li came to see Mr Huang and asked for his help again. She
said, "Dear Mr Huang, please help me to keep the poison from killing my
mother-in-law!
She's changed into such a nice woman, and I love her like my own mother.
I do not want her to die because of the poison I gave her".

Mr Huang smiled and nodded his head. "Li-Li, there's nothing to worry
about. I never gave you any poison.
The herbs I gave you were vitamins to improve her health. The only
poison was in your mind and your attitude toward her, but that has been
all washed away by the love which you gave to her".

THE MORAL OF THE STORY..
How you treat other people is exactly how they will treat you.

There is a wise Chinese saying:
"The person who loves others will also be loved in return. God might be
trying to work in another person's life through you."

How Men & Women Differ

2007-12-04T18:49:00.000+08:00

NICKNAMES
* If Laura, Kate and Sarah go out for lunch, they will call each other
Laura, Kate and Sarah.
* If Mike, Dave and John go out, they will affectionately refer to each
other as Fat Boy, Godzilla and Four-eyes.

EATING OUT
* When the bill arrives, Mike, Dave and John will each throw in $20,
even though it's only for $32.50. None of them will have anything
smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.
* When the girls get their bill, out come the pocket calculators.

MONEY
* A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.
* A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need but it's on
sale

BATHROOMS
* A man has six items in his bathroom: toothbrush and toothpaste,
shaving cream, razor, a bar of soap, and a towel from M&S.
* The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A
man would not be able to identify more than 20 of these items.

ARGUMENTS
* A woman has the last word in any argument.
* Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

CATS
* Women love cats.
* Men say they love cats, but when women aren't looking, men kick cats.

FUTURE
* A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.
* A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

SUCCESS
* A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.
* A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
* A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.
* A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change, but she does.

DRESSING UP
* A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the
bins, answer the phone, read a book, and get the post.
* A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
* Men wake up as good-looking as they went to bed.
* Women somehow deteriorate during the night.

OFFSPRING
* Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about
dentist appointments and romances, best friends, favourite foods, secret
fears and hopes and dreams.
* A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
* Any married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two
people remembering the same thing.

* What a woman says: C'mon..This place is a mess. You and I need to
clean.Your trousers are on the floor and you'll have no clothes if we
don't do the laundry now.
* What a man hears: C'MON ... blah, blah, blah YOU AND I blah,blah,
blah, blah, blah ON THE FLOOR blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES blah, blah,
blah, blah, NOW

What do you think? Leave a comment here and we'll see who thinks best. ;)

SEVEN WONDERS OF MALAYSIA BOLEH

2007-12-02T21:02:00.000+08:00

Organisers recently announced the seven new wonders of the world. Here
in MALAYSIA Bolihland we have our very own 7 wonders.

1. THE ZAKARIA 'PALACE'
The only building built with no approval and unpaid assessment fees
that is not demolished and sealed. The owner is the first bankrupt to
be able to own a palace.

2. THE 'BOCOR' PARLIAMENT
The unique feature is its ability to 'leak' away billions of taxpayers
money while the guardians of the nation stood there all wet.

3. 'UNHAUNTED' KUCHING PRISON
The only $600M prison in this world that is free of haunted stories
and encounters. Reasons No execution was done here before. In fact no
prisoners were held in here. There are also no concrete walls with
barbed wires to contain souls - both dead and alive. Maybe it can
qualify as the first imaginary prison built with real money.

4. PAYA INDAH 'WASTED' WETLANDS
The nation's premier eco-tourism park holds the record in the category
of attracting more lawyers with litigation than tourists with
binoculars.

5. 'NOT SO' SMART TUNNEL
Uniquely design to alleviate floods. When completed, it does
everything except alleviate floods.

6. 'DISCONNECTED' CYBERJAYA
The one and only high tech city in the world that offers limited or no
internet connection to its
residents.

7. CROOKED 'CROOKED' BRIDGE
The most crooked bridge in the world dreamt by a most crooked mind.
Too bad it was abandoned; otherwise it would make it as one of the
wonders.

LATEST 8th WONDER :
1ST MALAYSIAN ASTRO MAN BLASTED OFF TO NOWHERE WITH MILLIONS OF RAKYAT
MONEY BURNT IN 10 DAYS FOR THE MOST EXPENSIVE SPACE EXPEDITION HAS
ENTER INTO THE MALAYSIAN GUINESS BOOK RECORD AT 10 PM ON 0CT 10, 2007.
BRAVO!
( p.s. NO WONDERS - PRICES today had increased "NAIK , NAIK, NAIK " in
2007....look and see....for sure....garanteeeeeee....tahun depan
minyak mestiiiiiiii naik punya....this year cannot naik....sebab sudah
promise-mah...!!!! tahun depan sure naik like soyuz pecut...dasyhat
looo....

HANYA DAP ROCKET - TAK BOLEH NAIK !!

TARGETTED NEXT WONDER:-

THE RUSSIANS ARE LAUGHING... THIS IS GOOD BUSINESS!!! SO THEY ARE
OFFERING ANOTHER TAXI RIDE TO NOWHERE FOR ANOTHER MALAYSIAN ASTRAU-NUT /
ANGKA SAWAN. SO PEOPLE OF MALAYSIA, BE PREPARED TO FORK OUT ANOTHER
RM100 M ++ AND BRACE FOR BARANG2 TERUS NAIK PUNYA BECAUSE WE ARE
PAYING FOR IT....

MALAYSIA MASIH BOLEH (BAYAR) ....OR SO THE GOVERNMENT SAYS.

Pretty Women!!! 美女!!!

2007-11-23T12:27:00.000+08:00

When we are sitting down near a playground, a Pretty Women appeared....
当我们坐在一个靠儿童游乐场的时候，一个美女经过。。。

網路大戰 Internet War - Namewee 明志

2007-11-20T22:16:00.000+08:00

Namewee, the creator of a list of controversial videos, namely Negarakuku, Kawanku, Muar Chinese, etc had just launched a new video with the title "Internet War".

网络歌手黄明志在发行了几首备受争议的歌曲后，又有最新进展了。他目前推出了最新的歌曲，“网络大战”。

Comments are welcome. Thank you.
敬请留言。谢谢。

The Chief Judge of Malaysia's Scandal - EarthExplode.Org

2007-11-20T21:42:00.000+08:00

This is a video about the scandal of the judisuary in Malaysia.
The story is where a Malaysian lawyer is able to appoint judges.

Feel free to leave your comment. ;)

Malaysian Astronauts - Hilarious!

2007-11-17T12:53:00.000+08:00

American Spaceman is called Astronaut
Russian Spaceman is called Cosmonaut
Chinese Spaceman is called Taikonaut
Malaysian Spaceman??? - Can-or-naut

Dr. M was thinking about sending somebody into space. Three potential can-or-nauts were called for an interview - one Indian, one Malay and one Chinese.

Dr. M interviews the Indian first: "So, Muthu, this is a dangerous mission. How much do you think you should be paid?"

Muthu replied: "One million ringgit."

"Why so much?" asks Dr. M.

"Very dangerous mission, Datuk. Maybe no come back!" replied Muthu.

"That's understandable," says Dr. M. "Thank you..

Please ask the Malay guy to come here,"

So the Malay walks up, and is asked the same question.

"Alamak!...2 million, Datuk," replied the Malay candidate.

"Two million? That's twice as much! Even the aneh before you asked for only one million."

"You see, Datuk," explains Mat, "I have 4 wives and 15 children ... With 20 of us, it is a big family to support when I am gone...!"

"I see," says Dr. M. "Okay, can you ask that Chinese guy to come then?"

The Chinese guy comes in and Dr. M asks, "Ah Chong, given this is a very risky mission, how much do you want?"

Ah Chong thinks for a while, and says, "3 million."

Mahathir appears shocked. "What?!? 3 million!

"Why so much?"

Ah Chong beckons Dr. M to come closer. He quietly whispers into his ear, "Datuk, one million you keep, one million I keep, and then one more million to send that aneh into space lah!"

A true story about 2 sons, Proton and Perodua

2007-10-27T18:22:00.000+08:00

Once, there was a family known as Malaysia. In 1985, they were blessed with their first born, Proton. The family loved Proton all they can. They gave Proton everything. They protected Proton from the bigger boys in Kindergarten. They told Proton, "You're young, you need protection from them. It's okay to make mistakes, you're young. Even if you don't learn from mistakes...it's okay...you are young."

Proton became spoilt. He always depended on parents and used up all his allowance on useless things. When he had to do his chores, he paid people to do it and the work is lousy, causing the parents having to call repairmen to fix all the mess that he made.

Anyway, when Proton was 10 (but he still acted like he is 1 or 2 years old), he had a younger brother, Perodua. At first, everyone thought this younger brother will be like Proton. Anyway, this new baby was more > >> handsome and looks smarter than Proton. Malaysia knew there is a possibility Perodua could be smarter than Proton. Since they love
Proton so much, they decided that Perodua can only learn a few things. cannot learn the same thing as Proton. This is so that Perodua wouldn't beat Proton at what Proton is doing.

Although Perodua was also protected by Malaysia, he learn to be independent very fast. He made good friends with Daihatsu, who had an elder brother Toyota. The two of them helped Perodua in everything. Perodua, being independent and smart, learnt a lot and in a short while, was becoming as good as, if not better, than Proton.

Malaysia realized that Perodua was becoming better than his brother. Although proud of Perodua, they still love Proton best. They paid Lotus(which is older and well known worldwide) to be friends with Proton. Using this advantage, Proton mentioned Lotus everytime he wanted to tell people about himself. On this own, he was still the same.

Moreover, Proton is always not updated. When doing his work, he still uses the typewriter and refuses to use the computer. Perodua, so much younger, used the computer, with broadband for his work. Perodua was improving so much that Toyota has assigned him with his work, codename Avanza.

2005. Proton is 20 years old, Perodua only 10. It was obvious that Perodua was the more successful of the two siblings. What is worse, Proton said he still need his parents to help him for another 10 years. He still need to protection from the big boys. In May 2005, Perodua was about to show Malaysia his best work so far...codename Myvi.
Proton, being jealous...quickly came up with an unprofessional remark about Perodua's work and show his work at the same time as Perodua on purpose The future of Malaysia and her two kids are still unknown. But it would be obvious that Perodua will shine, leaving Proton crying. It would be a wonder if in 2015, Proton will ask Malaysia for another 10 years of help and protection...maybe this time...protection from Perodua as
well...........THE END

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2007-10-08T22:53:00.000+08:00

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The 11st Husband - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-10-03T00:11:00.000+08:00

A young man married a beautiful woman who had previously divorced 10 husbands. On their wedding night, she told her new husband to "Please be gentle; I'm still a virgin".

"What?" said the puzzled groom. "How can that be if you've been married ten times.?"

"Well, husband#1 was a Sales Representative; he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

"Husband # 2 was in Software Services; he was never really sure how it was suppose to function; but he said he'd look into it and get back with me.

"Husband # 3 was from Field Services; he said that everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn't get the system up.

"Husband # 4 was in Telemarketing; even though he knew he had the order, he didn't know when he would be able to deliver.

"Husband # 5 was an Engineer, he understood the basic process but he wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state of the-art method.

"Husband #6 was from Administration; he thought he knew how but he wasn't sure whether it was his job or not.

"Husband # 7 was in Marketing; although he had a product, he was never sure how to position it.

"Husband # 8 was a Psychiatrist; all he did was talk about it.

"Husband # 9 was a Gynecologist; all he did was look at it.

"Husband # 10 was a Stamp Collector; all he ever did was........ God I miss him.

" But now that I've married you, I'm so excited".

"Wonderful", said the husband, "but why?

"Your're with the "GOVERNMENT"..
This time I KNOW I'M gonna get
SCREWED."

For more jokes, please visit EarthExplode.Org

Vote For Us at the Start Up Nation's Home Based 100 Ranking Greenest Bussiness!!

2007-10-01T02:23:00.000+08:00

Please vote for us! We are very environmental friendly. Please save the environment. Recycle, think before you throw, you can make a difference to prevent the Earth from Exploding as a result of the acts of unscrupulous humans (which doesn't include us). We human destroys the Earth TOO MUCH! Its time for us to pay back to mother nature before its TOO LATE! (who knows, Earth may Explode some day...)

Please save mother nature. Vote for us HERE! Thanks in advance!

Add Maths Form 5 2007 Folio - EarthExplode.Org

2007-10-01T02:21:00.000+08:00

I had uploaded the complete Microsoft Word formatted folio for everyone to download. Guaranteed to get A1! ;-) Check it out at EarthExplode.Org - Malacca High School

Flash Games - EarthExplode.Org

2007-10-01T02:19:00.000+08:00

Hi everybody, want to play some awsome free flash games? check out EarthExplode.Org to Play Tonnes of FREE Cool Flash Games! Click HERE!

Tiger Siblings - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-09-18T19:50:00.000+08:00

Long Long time ago, in the Tiger Kingdom lived a pair of siblings.
Both were blessed with some gifts.
Brother had a pair of eyes who could see a distance far far away
Sister had a pair of ears who could listen to anything
They grew up together and experienced happiness and sadness together.
They like to run to the hills to play. Brother would look at far away
countries and tell the sister the majestic view that he see. Sister
would listen to the beautiful sounds and describe for the brother.

As time goes by, brother and sister started to fall in love with each
other. They knew that it was wrong, but they could not control
themselves. They continued to love each other.

Alas, their parents found out about it. Father was very mad, mother was
very sad. The neighbours would point fingers at them and gossip about
them. Brother and sister were adamant about their love for each other.
To prove that they were truly in love with each other, Brother
destroyed his eyes and Sister destroyed her ears. They felt that
since they could not get the blessings, they did not want the gifts...

Long long after, a musician heard this beautiful love story and was
touched by it. He decided to compose a song for the lovers.
I came across this song and it touched my heart too. However, I did
not buy his CD, so I cannot share with you the lovely song.

I remembered the lyrics though, and will share with you how touching
this song is... enjoy..
(in chinese)

Liang zhi lao hu, Liang zhi lao hu （两只老虎，两只老虎）

Pao de kuai, pao de kaui （跑得快，跑得快）

Yi zhi mei you yan jing, yi zhi mei you er duo （一只没有眼睛，一只没有耳朵）

Zhen qi guai, zhen qi guai.... （真奇怪，真奇怪）

For more jokes, check out EarthExplode.Org

Poison Husband - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-09-18T19:45:00.000+08:00

A nice, calm and respectable lady went into the chemist, walked right up to the pharmacist, looked straight into his eyes, and said,

"I would like to buy some cyanide."

The pharmacist asked,
"Why in the world do you need cyanide?"

The lady replied,
"I need it to poison my husband."

The pharmacist's eyes got big and he exclaimed,
"Lord have mercy! I can't give you cyanide to kill your husband! That's against the law! I'll lose my license! They'll throw both of us in jail! All kinds of bad things will happen. Absolutely not! You CANNOT have any cyanide!"

The lady reached into her purse and pulled out a picture of her husband
in bed with the pharmacist's wife.

The pharmacist looked at the picture and replied,
"Well now, that's different. You didn't tell me you had a prescription."

For more jokes, check out EarthExplode.Org

Check out EarthExplode.Org Toolbar with lots of features!

2007-09-17T21:15:00.000+08:00

EarthExplode.Org Toolbar has tones of features which are available and more are coming soon!

Some Features of EarthExplode.Org Toolbar:-

-Effective Pop-Up Blocker
-Powerful Search Engine, Powered by Google
-Get the Latest News Feed Directly
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Download it TODAY at EarthExplode.Org!

World’s Smallest Camcorder from Sony to Enter the Market - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-15T15:46:00.000+08:00

Introducing the new Handycam® CX7EK (HDR-CX7EK) by Sony, the first Memory Stick capable Handycam® camcorder that records high-definition videos and captures up to 6.1 mega pixels of still images in various Memory Stick™ media including the Memory Stick™ PRO DUO, Memory Stick™ PRO-HG DUO and Memory Stick™ Micro.

Introducing the new Handycam® CX7EK (HDR-CX7EK) by Sony, the first Memory Stick capable Handycam® camcorder that records high-definition videos and captures up to 6.1 mega pixels of still images in various Memory Stick™ media including the Memory Stick™ PRO DUO, Memory Stick™ PRO-HG DUO and Memory Stick™ Micro.

More info at EarthExplode.Org!

DOWNLOAD FREE LEGAL MUSIC NOW! Free tips for Downloading YouTube Videos Coming Soon!

2007-09-15T04:28:00.000+08:00

DOWNLOAD FREE LEGAL MUSIC NOW!

FREE tips for Downloading YouTube Videos COMING SOON!!

Check out our MUSIC & VIDEO Section.

Origin of 'Negaraku'......

2007-09-08T02:42:00.000+08:00

Are you a Malaysian? Have you ever noticed that Malaysia's national anthem is not original? From what we had learned in our History textbook, the national anthem, 'Negaraku' is chosen and taken from the Perak state anthem, 'Terang Bulan'. It was handpicked by Tunku Abdul Rahman Putra Al-Haj, the first prime minister of Malaysia.

However, have you ever noticed that actually the state anthem of Perak was not original also? The melody and some lyrics are actually taken from a popular Indonesian hits song at that time, also named 'Terang Bulan'. But the lyrics are rather awkward and funny. Check it out:-

"Terang bulan,
Terang bulan di kali,
Buaya timbul disangkalah mati.
Jangan percaya mulutlah lelaki,
Berani sumpah 'tapi takut mati.
Jangan percaya mulutlah lelaki,
Berani sumpah 'tapi takut mati."

I think it is rather cute as the lyrics says that "Jangan percaya mulutlah lelaki,
Berani sumpah 'tapi takut mati.", which means "don't believe in a man's word, as they dare to promise, but are coward and are afraid to die, which indirectly means thay can't keep their promises."

This is the video of the song, Terang Bulan:-

Actually, there are lots of versions of 'Terang Bulan' during that time, the version above is just one of the earliest version. There is another rock version of it. Enjoy it here:-

While we are enjoying the Indonesian song, we should have known that they aren't fit to create the high standard and classy feeling of the melody. So they must have copied it from somewhere else also. At last, let the truth behold! The melody actually came from an American-Hawaiian Song, 'Mamula Moon'. Are you excited about hearing the song 'Mamula Moon'? Not to worry, I have it right here:-

Besides that, we also have the much controversial 'NegaraKUKU' which is now being monitored by the government, so I think it is inappropriate to post that video here. Anyway, there is a NEW VERSION of our national anthem, but it is edited by someone unknown on the web. This latest version is less sensitive compared to the former, but quite nice also. It has Mandarin and English subtitles:-

Before I end this entry, I have to clarify something first. I don't intend to post this entry to stir up any sensitive issues or whatever. I am also not responsible for the content of the videos posted here, as I am not the creator of the videos. My intention is just to let every Malaysian know the truth of our Malaysian national anthem's history.

Finally, EarthExplode.Org whishes Malaysia 'Happy 50th Birthday!'

Malaysia - 1957 - Celebrating 50 Years of Nationhood - Malaysiaku Gemilang

Malacca High School - Estd 1826 - Celebrating 180 Years of Excellence - Meliora Hic Sequamor

Apple unveils iPod touch - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-08T01:28:00.001+08:00

The new iPod touch introduced today features built-in Wi-Fi networking and a revolutionary multi-touch user interface—first introduced on iPhone—that makes it easy to find all of your music, video, and other digital content and enjoy it on the gorgeous widescreen display on iPod touch. The multi-touch interface uses pioneering new software to present the perfect user interface for Safari, Apple’s YouTube application, and the new iTunes Wi-Fi Music Store—all of which come with iPod touch. An unbelievable 8mm thin, iPod touch features up to 22 hours of audio playback and up to five hours of video playback. Available later this month, iPod touch comes in 8GB and 16GB models for $299 and $399, respectively.

Guided tour:-

For more info, please check out www.EarthExplode.Org

爸，我回来了 - Jay Chow Song - by Namewee - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-05T23:09:00.000+08:00

This is the video of Jay Chow or 周杰伦/ 周董 few years ago. It was sang by Namewee during his school's activity.

Download YouTube Videos? Check out www.EarthExplode.Org!

NegaraKUKUKU (NEW version) - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-05T23:04:00.000+08:00

This is the NEW VERSION of the much controversial 'Negarakuku' video. But this video is much moderate compared to the former, with more critics but in a mild way. This video also touch less on religion issues, which is more suitable to be viewed by Malaysian public.

Download YouTube Videos? Check out http://www.earthexplode.org/!

盗版之王-黄明志-个人专辑全国发行-敬请期待9月3号-EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-03T20:20:00.000+08:00

Namewee's latest video, which will be included in his latest ORIGINAL EP.

http://www.earthexplode.org/

Nokia's Answer to Apple's iPhone - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-03T19:47:00.000+08:00

This is the video of Nokia's latest phone, which has similar functions to the iPhone. Nokia launches this phone to compete with Apple's hot selling iPhone. More information to come.

For more info, please check out http://www.earthexplode.org/

Zodiac - EarthExplode.Org

2007-09-01T15:30:00.000+08:00

Dear All,
It would better if we lean by heart all these line zodiac. for ourselves and friends.

VIRGO - The PerfectionistDominant in relationships. Conservative. Always wants the last word. Argumentative. Worries. Very smart. Dislikes noise and chaos. Eager. Hardworking. Loyal. Beautiful. Easy to talk to. Hard to please. Harsh. Practical and very fussy. Often shy. Pessimistic.

SCORPIO - The Intense OneVery energetic. Intelligent. Can be jealous and/or possessive. Hardworking. Great kisser. Can become obsessive or secretive. Holds grudges. Attractive. Determined. Loves being in long relationships. Talkative. Romantic. Can be self-centered at times. Passionate and Emotional.

LIBRA - The Harmonizer Nice to everyone they meet. Can't make up their mind. Have own unique appeal. Creative, energetic, and very social. Hates to be alone. Peaceful, generous. Very loving and beautiful. Flirtatious. Give in too easily. Procrastinators. Very gullible.

ARIES – TheDaredevil Energetic. Adventurous and spontaneous. Confident and enthusiastic. Fun. Loves a challenge. EXTREMELY impatient. Sometimes selfish. Short fuse. (easily angered.) Lively, passionate, and sharp wit. Outgoing. Lose interest quickly - easily bored. Egotistical. Courageous and assertive. Tends to be physical and athletic.

AQUARIUS - The Sweetheart Optimistic and honest. Sweet personality. Very independent. Inventive and intelligent. Friendly and loyal. Can seem unemotional. Can be a bit rebellious. Very stubborn, but original and unique. Attractive on the inside and out. Eccentric personality.

GEMINI - The Chatterbox Smart and witty. Outgoing, very chatty. Lively, energetic. Adaptable but needs to express themselves. Argumentative and outspoken. Likes change. Versatile. Busy, sometimes nervous and tense. Gossips. May seem superficial or inconsistent, But is only changeable. Beautiful physically and mentally.

LEO - The BossVery organized. Need order in their lives - like being in control. Like boundaries. Tend to take over everything. Bossy. Like to help others. Social and outgoing. Extroverted. Generous, warm-hearted. Sensitive. Creative energy. Full of themselves. Loving. D oing the right thing is important to Leos. Attractive.

CANCER - The ProtectorMoody, emotional. May be shy. Very loving and caring. Pretty/handsome. Excellent partners for life. Protective. Inventive and imaginative. Cautious. Touchy-feely kind of person. Needs love from others. Easily hurt, but sympathetic.

PISCES - The Dreamer Generous, kind, and thoughtful. Very creative and imaginative. May become secretive and vague. Sensitive. Don't like details. Dreamy and unrealistic. Sympathetic and loving. Kind. Unselfish. Good kisser. Beautiful.

CAPRICORN - The Go-GetterPatient and wise. Practical and rigid. Ambitious. Tends to be good-looking. Humorous and funny. Can be a bit shy and reserved. Often pessimists. Capricorns tend to act before they think and can be unfriendl y at times. Hold grudges. Like competition. Get what they want.

TAURUS - The Enduring One Charming but aggressive. Can come off as boring, but they are not. Hard workers. Warm-hearted. Strong, has endurance. Solid beings who are stable and secure in their ways. Not looking for shortcuts. Take pride in their beauty. Patient and reliable. Make great friends and give good advice. Loving and kind. Loves hard - passionate. Express themselves emotionally. Prone to ferocious temper-tantrums. Determined. Indulge themselves often. Very generous.

SAGITTARIUS - The Happy-Go-Lucky OneGood-natured optimist. Doesn't want to grow up (Peter Pan Syndrome). Indulges self. Boastful. Likes luxuries and gambling. Social and outgoing. Doesn't like responsibilities. Often fantasizes. Impatient. Fun to be around. Having lots of friends. Flirtatious. Doesn't like rules. Sometimes hypocritical. Dislikes being confined - tight spaces or even tight clothes. Doesn't like being doubted. Beautiful inside and out.

www.EarthExplode.Org

MAY BANK ATM FRAUD - EarthExplode.Org

2007-08-31T00:09:00.000+08:00

Maybank Account Holder Please Read...

Whoever has the Maybank account number with ATM card, please be
careful when withdrawing money through ATM machine,

1. For the first time when you enter the right pin number, a
message "invalid pin number" pops up.

2. Then, when you enter your pin number for the second time, a
message "invalid pin number, please call this number "xxx-xxxx"
pops up.

3. If you call this number, you will lose all your money.

NOTE : if you encounter the above matter, please DO NOT call
the number. One of victim just lost RM ! 700.00 on last Sunday
and Maybank checked his
last transaction was on that day itself even though he did not
withdraw any money. Please forward this to your friends.

www.EarthExplode.Org

Good Old Fred - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-08-31T00:06:00.000+08:00

Old Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them. As the preacher stood next to the bed, Old Fred's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on.

The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Old Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died. The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket.

At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realised that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Old Fred died. He said, " You know,Old Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven't looked at it, but knowing Fred,I'm sure there are words of inspiration for us all". He opened the note, and read,"Hey,you're standing on my oxygen tube!".

More jokes at www.EarthExplode.Org

Divorce Letters - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-08-29T19:40:00.000+08:00

Dear Wife:

I'm writing you this letter to tell you that I'm leaving you for good. I've been a good man to you for seven years and I have nothing to show for it. These last two weeks have been hell. Your boss called to tell me that you had quit your job today and that was the last straw.

Last week, you came home and didn't even notice that I had gotten a new hair cut, cooked your favorite meal, and even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers later that night.

You came home, nibbled at your food for two minutes, and went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don't tell me you love me anymore, you don't want sex anymore or anything. Either you're cheating on me or you don't love me. Whichever is the case...I'm gone!

Signed,

Your EX-Husband

P.S. Don't try to find me. Your sister and I are moving away to West Virginia together. Have a great life!

Dear Ex-Husband:

Nothing has made my day more enjoyable than receiving your letter. It's true that you and I have been married for seven years, although a 'good man' is a far cry from what you've been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining and griping. It's just too bad it doesn't work.

Yes, I did notice when you got a hair cut last week...and actually the first thing that came to my mind was "You look just like a girl"...
but my mother raised me not to say anything at all if you can't say anything nice. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with my SISTER, because I stopped eating pork seven years ago.

I turned away from you when you had those new silk boxers on because the price tag was still on them. I prayed that it was just a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed fifty dollars from me that morning and your silk boxers were $49.99...

After all of this, I still loved you and felt that we could work it out. So when I discovered that I had hit the lotto for twenty million dollars, I quit my job and bought us two tickets to Hawaii. But when I got home you were gone. Everything happens for a reason I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you've always wanted.

My lawyer said with the letter that you wrote, you won't get a dime from me. So take care.

Signed:
Rich As Hell and Freeeeeeeeeeee!

P.S. I don't know if I ever told you this but my sister 'Carla',,,was born Carl. I hope that's not a problem for you.

For more jokes, please visit www.EarthExplode.Org

Upgrade System (upgrade from boyfriend to husband) - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-08-27T19:00:00.000+08:00

Dear IT Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower, gifts and jewellery applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as Formula One 5.0, NBA 3.0 and World Cup 2.0.

And now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate Housewife

Reply:
Dear Desperate Housewife,

First keep in mind:
Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Try entering the command C:\ I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download
Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Late Night Teh Tarik 6.1.

Late Night 6.1 is a very bad program that will create SnoringLoudly.wav files.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or reinstall another
Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.

You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Tasty Food 3.0 and Tongkat Ali 6.9.

Good Luck,
IT Support

For more jokes, please visit www.EarthExplode.Org

Memo on Training - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-08-27T18:57:00.000+08:00

Important Memo to all Employees
Memo to All Employees

In order to ensure the highest levels of quality work and productivity from
employees, it will be our policy to keep alemployees well trained through
our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T) .

We are trying to give our employees more S.H.I.T than anyone else. If you
feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T on the course, please
see your supervisor . You will be immediately placed at the top of the
S.H.I.T list and our supervisor s are especially skilled at seeing you get
all the S.H.I.T you can handle.

Employees who don ' t take their S.H.I.T will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL
EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T) .

Those who fail to take D.E.E.P.S.H.I.T seriously will have to go to
EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T).
Since our supervisor s took S.H.I.T before they were promoted, they don ' t
have to do S.H.I.T anymore, and are all full of S.H.I.T already.

If you are full of S.H.I.T , you may be interested in a job teaching
others.
We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LIST of LEADERS
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).

For employees who are intending to pursue a career in management and
consulting, we will refer you to the department of MANAGERIAL OPERATIONAL
RESEARCH EDUCATION (M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T) . This course emphasizes how to manage
M.O.R.E.S.H.I.T

If you have further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TEACHING,
SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (H.O.T.S.H.I.T) .

Thank you.

BOSS IN GENERAL, SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING
(B.I.G.S.H.I.T)

P.S.: Now send this S.H.I.T to 5 people who need S.H.I.T in their lives,
just not the same person who sent you this S.H.I.T . I have already had my
fill of S.H.I.T.

Thank you for your time!

Sincerely

The Director Under the Main Bureau of Super High Intensity Training.
(The D.U.M.B.S.H.I.T)

For more jokes, please visit www.EarthExplode.Org

Cute Koala - EarthExplode.Org Jokes

2007-08-27T18:44:00.000+08:00

A koala was sitting in a gum tree...... smoking a joint

when a little lizard walked past, looked up and said,
"Hey Koala! What are you doing?"

The koala said, "Smoking a joint, come up and have some."

So the little lizard climbed up and sat next to the koala
where they enjoyed a few joints.

After a while the little lizard said that his mouth was "dry"
and that he was going to get a drink from the river.
The little lizard was so stoned that he leaned too far
over and fell into the river.

A crocodile saw this and swam over to the little lizard and
helped him to the side. Then he asked the little lizard,
"What ' s the matter with you?"

The little lizard explained to the crocodile that he
was sitting smoking a joint with the koala in the tree,
got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.

The crocodile said that he had to check this out and walked
into the rain forest, found the tree where the koala was
sitting finishing a joint. The crocodile looked up and said,
"Hey you!"

So the koala looked down at him and said,

"Shiiiiiiiiiiit dude.....
How much water did you drink?!!"

For more jokes, please go to www.EarthExplode.Org

Apple Unveils New iMac

2007-08-27T01:01:00.000+08:00

11 August 2007 - Apple® today unveiled an all new all-in-one iMac® line featuring gorgeous 20- and 24-inch widescreen displays encased in elegant and professional aluminum and glass enclosures. The entire new iMac line features the latest Intel Core 2 Duo processors and a new, ultra-thin aluminum Apple Keyboard, built-in iSight® video camera for video conferencing and iLife® ’08, making it the ultimate digital lifestyle desktop computer for both consumers and professionals. The 20-inch iMac now starts at just $1,199, $300 less than the previous 20-inch model, and the 24-inch iMac starts at just $1,799, $200 less than the previous 24-inch model.

For more info, please go to www.EarthExplode.Org

Apple Enhances .Mac

2007-08-27T00:58:00.000+08:00

11 August 2007 - Apple® today announced significant enhancements to its .Mac online service, highlighted by the debut of .Mac Web Gallery, a new feature for sharing photos and movies on the Internet. .Mac Web Gallery lets members easily share photos and movies directly from iLife® ’08 with anyone on a Mac®, PC or iPhone™ in stunning quality. In addition, .Mac Web Gallery visitors can download high quality images for printing and even contribute photos using a standard web browser or email. Other new .Mac features include a tenfold increase in .Mac storage to 10GB, support for personal domains for iWeb™ websites and enhancements to .Mac Mail.

For more info, please go to http://www.earthexplode.org/

Apple Introduces iWork ’08

2007-08-27T00:57:00.000+08:00

11 August 2007 - Apple® today introduced iWork™ ’08, a significant upgrade to Apple’s productivity software suite featuring new versions of Pages® and Keynote word processing and presentation applications, and introducing an innovative new spreadsheet application called “Numbers.” Numbers introduces the concept of intelligent tables on a flexible canvas, a new approach that makes it easy to organize information, create calculations, analyze results and make spreadsheets look as great as they work. Pages ’08 now features distinct modes for streamlined word processing and flexible page layout, a new contextual format bar and change tracking, and Keynote ’08 now includes text effects, transitions and themes that help users easily compose spectacular presentations, and Smart Builds with easy-to-set-up A-to-B animations that make impressive animations easy for anyone to create.

For more info, please go to http://www.earthexplode.org/

Apple Introduces iLife ’08

2007-08-27T00:55:00.000+08:00

11 August 2007 - Apple® today introduced iLife® ’08, the most significant upgrade ever to Apple’s award-winning suite of digital lifestyle applications, featuring a major new version of iPhoto® and a completely reinvented iMovie®. iPhoto ’08 automatically organizes photo libraries into Events that let users more easily manage their growing photo collections, and iMovie ’08 introduces an entirely new way for users to quickly make movies and share them online. Both iPhoto and iMovie integrate seamlessly with the new .Mac Web Gallery, Apple’s new service for .Mac members to instantly create and host stunning online websites for their photos and videos. iLife ’08 also features iWeb™ ’08, with live web widgets such as Google Maps that let users create even more dynamic websites, and GarageBand™ ’08, with its new Magic GarageBand feature that makes it fun and easy for both musicians and non-musicians to create great sounding songs.

For more info, please go to http://www.earthexplode.org/

Negarakuku 我爱我的国家-马来西亚 - Kawanku 我的朋友 - Muar Chinese 麻玻的华语 - SUPPORT namewee!!

2007-07-23T01:33:00.000+08:00

Negarakuku 我爱我的国家-马来西亚 - Kawanku 我的朋友 - Muar Chinese 麻玻的华语 - SUPPORT namewee!!

2007-07-23T01:27:00.000+08:00

其实明志我觉得并没有错，他只是以批评的方式来表现出他的爱国心。＂打你吗你都是为你好的...It's for Your own good..." 那也有错吗？你觉得呢？

Negarakuku 我爱我的国家－马来西亚 I love Malaysia - Muar Chinese 3 - SUPPORT namewee!!!

2007-07-23T01:23:00.001+08:00

Negarakuku 我爱我的国家－马来西亚 I love Malaysia - Muar Chinese 3 - SUPPORT namawe!!!

Kawanku 我的朋友 My Friend - Muar Chinese 2 - SUPPORT namawe!

2007-07-23T01:19:00.001+08:00

Kawanku 我的朋友 My Friend - Muar Chinese 2 - SUPPORT namawe!

Muar Chinese 麻玻的华语 - SUPPORT namewee!!

2007-07-23T01:12:00.001+08:00

Muar Chinese 麻玻的华语 - SUPPORT namawe!!

Malacca High School 180th Anniversary Cellebration

2007-06-28T01:34:00.000+08:00

CONFIRMED: MHS 180th Anniversary Celebration will be held from 26th till 28th of July 2007.

MHS, established since the year 1826, will celebrate its 180th 'birthday' throughout the year of 2007. Lots of programmes and activities are planned for this grand celebration. The school has started to upgrade the facilities and the outer look of the school recently to gear ourselves for this joyous event. There are lots of speculations about the date of the celebration. As we have expected, the will beheld from 26th till 28th of July 2007.

On the 26th and 27th of July, we will have our Hari Kantin, Hari Ko-Ku, Hari Q, etc. There is a plan where the whole school's students and teachers will camp at the school for a night. But this plan was scrapped because of the lack of facilities in the school.

On the 28th of July, there will be a mass celebration of MHS's 180th Anniversary. The main event will be held at the school hall. All MHS's teachers, students, ex-teachers, Old Boys and those who have direct or indirect link with MHS. are invited to the event. At night, there will be a mass dinner which consist of people stated above, possibly at Equatorial Hotel due to its location and space. The ticket for the dinner is being printed and will be sold to anyone who are interested to join the dinner. The price of the ticket is yet to be confirmed.

Besides, the school also plan to launch a 'Tabung Pendidikan MHS'. The tabung's money will come from donations by students, teachers, etc. It will be used for curiculum and co-curiculum activities organized by the school and students.

To be updated. Please email me at lee_han_chen@hotmail.com if you have any enquiries or to give information. Thank you.

Source: http://earthexplode.org/mhs180.aspx

Welcome!

2007-06-05T02:10:00.000+08:00

Welcome! This is the official blog for www.earthexplode.org , a site specially dedicated to Malacca High School in Malaysia. For enquiries or feedback, please don't hestitate to leave a comment. Thank you.

'Our Story' MHS (1826-2006) Now Available For Sale!

2007-06-01T20:59:00.000+08:00

'Our Story' Malacca High School (1826-2006)

NOW AVAILABLE FOR SALE!!

This limited edition Malacca High School 180th. Commemorative Book titled 'Our Story' Malacca High School [1826-2006] has been officially launched on Saturday, 9th. December 2006. The book features the history of Malacca High School, principals, teachers and students over her 180 years of history. The book is priced at RM 100.00 Ex-KL if it is self-collected.If it is delivered by Poslaju Courier, it will cost only RM116.00 per copy within East & West Malaysia. Payment by Account Payee cheque to MHS Anniversary and can be sent to: MHS Anniversary, c/o 14A, Jalan Pandan Indah 4/8, Pandan Indah, 55100 Kuala Lumpur,Malaysia. Tel:03-42948368. Attn: Mr. Kang

For overseas destinations such as Australia, Hong Kong, Singapore, United Kingdom, Europe and U.S.A., MHS Alumni members residing overseas can now buy and pay for this book via the Internet using AMEX, Visa or Mastercard. Upon confirmation, the book will be delivered to your home at only USD 90.00 per book including handling and courier charges. To buy now, Click Here.

Any profits will be channelled back to the school.

Source: http://earthexplode.org/news_ourstory.aspx

Earth Explode Org - Malacca High School

2007-06-01T20:55:00.000+08:00

Earth Explode Org - Malacca High School

Check out my website at www.earthexplode.org.

Help!

2007-06-01T06:19:00.000+08:00

Anybody can help out?? really quite urgent.. Thanks..

Earth Explode Org

2007-06-01T04:09:00.000+08:00

Everyone, please check out my website www.earthexplode.org. Anyone knows how to put this blog into my website? I am using Microsoft Office Live, which is a WYSIWYG hosting. This makes it very hard for me to integrate my blog into my own domain-www.earthexplode.org/blog.aspx . I don't know how to do it. Can anyone please help me?

testing

2007-05-30T05:00:00.001+08:00

testing 1, 2, 3,4 ...