I bumped into this funny joke somewhere and would like to share it with you guys. ;)
The joke is in BM. Must read till the end k! :D
apek: itu potong zaka ada bagut ka ?
ali : manyak bagut..bila lu potong haa lu punya barang manyak bersih loo..
apek:?!! err..saya kawan ada cakap,potong zaka aaahh.. manyak ploblem..
ali : apa probrem ?
apek:manyak buang lui..lagi aahh..dia punya performance tatak bagut.. manyak cinang semputloh..
ali : cehh.. apek, lu apa celita.. saya suda lama potong.. tada apa problem.. bini saya manyak puas woo..
apek:lu mini puas sama itu potong zaka ka?
ali : ya la.. bila lu potong aahh.. lagi sedap maen woo..lu lagi lambat pancut..
apek:???!!! err..lu punya 1.3 atau 1.5 ??
ali : ??!! woi apek cakap baik2 sikit ha.. saya punya 6 incila..
apek:??! tiu nia ma.. lu jgn maen2 haa.. mana ada potong zaka 6 inci..
ali : cilaka apek ni..nah tengok ( bukak sluar tunjuk pale butoh..)
apek: chee sin punya olang..gua tanya baik2 lu tunjuk lu punya lancau..
ali : abis.. lu tarak percaya..saya tunjuk la..
apek: saya tatak tanya sama lu punya lancau..
saya tanya lu pasal itu nasional car.. potong zaka.. molo punya olang..
ali : aiya.. apek.. lain kali lu sebut betul2 la..kasi susa saja..
bukan potong zaka la.. proton saga.. cinabeng btulla..
Saturday 26 January 2008
Friday 18 January 2008
Malaysin Chinese & Indian, WAKE UP!!!
This message is to provoke your mind to think whether you want the status
quo to be perpetuated. If you want to do your bit to effect a change for
the better, think well before you vote at the next general election.
Chances are that the B N will still win but we need to send the proper
signal to Pak Lah that enough is enough....
Below is the result of extreme discriminations and marginalization by the
BN govt for too many years. Let's keep circulating this esp before the next
election.
And today this is what happened in Malaysia racism.
These lists cover a period of about 49 years since Independence Day in
Malaysia (1957):
( 1) Out of all the 5 major banks in Malaysia, only one bank is own by
multi-racial, the rest are controlled by Malays.
(2) 99% of Petronas (the only one petroleum company) directors are Malays,
and the former Prime Minister work as Consultant in Petronas.
(3) 3% of Petronas employees are Chinese.
(4) 99% of 2000 Petronas gasoline stations are owned by Malays.
(5) 100% all contractors working under Petronas projects must be "bumi's
status" (Malay).
(6) 0% of non-Malays staffs are legally required in Malay's companies. But
there must be 30% Malays staffs in Chinese companies and shareholder. Which
this mean non-Malays own company needs to give their property to Malays.
And non-Malays citizen can't really own their business.
(7) 5% of all new intake for government police, nurses, army, is
non-Malays.
(8) 2% is the present Chinese staff in Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF),
drop from 40% in 1960.
(9) 2% is the percentage of non-Malays government servants in Putrajaya (
Malaysia main government office). But Malays make up 98%.
(10) 7% is the percentage of Chinese government servants in the whole
government (in 2004), drop from 30% in 1960. Only 2 position for non-Malays
in political status.
(11) 95% of government contracts are given to Malays; even it is an open
tender. Non-Malays contractors tender the lower price and use better
materials can't get the contract that government given.
(12) 100% all business licenses are controlled by Malay government e.g.
Taxi permits, Approved permits, etc. and all the license are given to
government officer families.
(13) 80% of the Chinese rice millers in Kedah (north of peninsular Malaysia
had to be sold to Malay and controlled by Bernas (Government Org.) since
1980s. Otherwise, life is make difficult for Chinese rice millers.
(14) 100 big companies set up, owned and managed by Chinese Malaysians were
taken over by government, and later managed by Malays since 1970's e.g.
UTC, UMBC, MISC, etc. This company now is the sole company.
(15) At least 10 Chinese owned bus companies (throughout
Malaysia,throughout 40 years) had to be sold to MARA or other Malay
transport companies due to rejection by Malay authority to Chinese
application for bus routes and rejection for their application for new
buses.
(16) 2 Chinese taxi drivers were barred from driving in Johor (South of
Peninsular Malaysia ) Larkin bus station. There are about 30 taxi drivers
and 3 are Chinese in October 2004. Spoiling taxi club properties was the
reason given.
(17) 0 non-Malays are allowed to get shop lots in the new Muar (city in
south peninsular Malaysia ) bus station (November 2004).
(18) 8000 billions ringgit is the total amount the government channeled to
Malays pockets through ASB, ASN, MARA, privatization of government agencies
like Tabung Haji etc, through NEP over 34 years periods.
(19) 48 Chinese primary schools closed down since 1968 รข¤" 2000
(20) 144 Tamil primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000
(21) 2637 Malay primary schools built since 1968 - 2000
(22) 2.5% is government budget for Chinese primary schools. Tamil schools
got only 1%, Malay schools got 96.5%
(23) While a Chinese parent with RM1000 salary (monthly) cannot get
school-text-book-loan, and a Malay parent with RM2000 salary is eligible.
(24) 10 all public universities vice chancellors are Malays. And politics
in universities are held by Malays. If non-Malays want to form a politics
parties, there is no way to get approved.
(25) 5% - the government universities lecturers of non-Malay origins had
been reduced from about 70% in 1965 to only 5% in 2004 with the reason
Malaysia Education Ministry give full support for Malays only.
(26) Only 5% is given to non-Malays for government scholarships over 40
years.
(27) 0 Chinese or Indians were sent to Japan and Korea under "Look East
Policy".
(28) 128 STPM (High Study / A Level) Chinese top students could not get
into the course that they aspired i.e. Medicine and doctors (in 2004).
Malays with not qualify result can get into the course.
(29) 10% place for non-bumi students for MARA science schools beginning
from year 2003, but only 7% are filled. Before that it was 100% Malays.
(30) 50 cases whereby Chinese and Indian Malaysians, are beaten up in the
National Service program since 2003.
(31) 25% is Malaysian Chinese population in 2004, drop from 45% since 1957
because government are not support non-Malays like government support
Malays.
(32) 7% is the present Malaysian Indians population (2004), a drop from 12%
since 1957.
(33) 2 millions Chinese Malaysians had emigrated to overseas since 40 years
ago due to unfair politics.
(34) 0.5 million Indians Malaysians had emigrated to overseas.
(35) 3 millions Indonesians had migrated into Malaysia and became malaysian
citizens with bumi's status.
(36) 600000 are the Chinese and Indians Malaysians with "red I/C" (a
temporary identity card) and were rejected repeatedly when applying for
citizenship for 40 years. Perhaps 60% of them had already passed away due
to old age. This shows racism of how easily Indonesians got their
citizenships compare with the Chinese and Indians
(37) 5% - 15% discount for a Malay to buy a house, regardless whether the
Malay is rich or poor
(38) 2% is what Chinese new villages get compare with 98% of what Malays
villages got for rural development budget..
(39) 50 road names (at least) had been change from Chinese names to other
names.
(40) 1 Dewan Gan Boon Leong (in Malacca) was altered to other name (
e.g.Dewan Serbaguna or sort) when it was being officially used for a few
days. Government tries to shun Chinese names. This racism happened in
around year 2000 or sort.
(41) 0 temples/churches were built for each housing estate. But every
housing estate MUST got at least one mosque/surau built.
(42) 3000 mosques/surau were built in all housing estates throughout
Malaysia since 1970 with full government support. No temples, no churches
are built in housing estates that supported by government.
(43) 1 Catholic Church in Shah Alam took 20 years to apply to be
constructed. But told by Malay authority that it must look like a factory
and can't look like a church. Still not yet approved since 2004.
(44) 1 publishing of Bible in Iban language banned (in 2002)
(45) 0 of the government TV stations (RTM1, RTM2, and TV3) have directors
of non-Malays origin.
(46) 30 government produced TV dramas and films always showed that the bad
guys had Chinese face, and the good guys had Malay face. You can check it
out since 1970s. Recent years, this tendency becomes less.
(47) 10 times, at least, Malays (especially Umno) had threatened to
massacre the Chinese Malaysians using May 13 since 1969.
(48) 20 constituencies won by DAP would not get funds from the government
to develop. Or these Chinese majority constituencies would be the last to
be developed
(49) 100 constituencies (parliaments and states) had been racist
re-delineated so Chinese voters were diluted that Chinese candidates,
particularly DAP candidates lost in election since 1970s
(50) Only 3 out of 12 human rights items are ratified by Malaysia
government since 1960
(51) 0 elimination of, all forms of racial discrimination (UN Human
Rights)is not ratified by Malaysia government since 1960s
(52) 20 reported cases whereby Malay ambulance attendance treated Chinese
patients inhumanely, and Malay government hospital staffs purposely delay
attending to Chinese patients in 2003. Unreported cases may be 200
(53) 50 cases each year whereby Chinese, especially Chinese youths being
beaten up by Malay youths in public places. We may check at police reports
provided the police took the report, otherwise there will be no record
(54) 20 cases every year whereby Chinese drivers who accidentally knocked
down Malays were seriously assaulted or killed by Malays
(55) 12% is what ASB/ASN (Malays Own banks) got per annum while banks fixed
deposit is only about 3.5% per annum.
And more cases haven't been discovered.
quo to be perpetuated. If you want to do your bit to effect a change for
the better, think well before you vote at the next general election.
Chances are that the B N will still win but we need to send the proper
signal to Pak Lah that enough is enough....
Below is the result of extreme discriminations and marginalization by the
BN govt for too many years. Let's keep circulating this esp before the next
election.
And today this is what happened in Malaysia racism.
These lists cover a period of about 49 years since Independence Day in
Malaysia (1957):
( 1) Out of all the 5 major banks in Malaysia, only one bank is own by
multi-racial, the rest are controlled by Malays.
(2) 99% of Petronas (the only one petroleum company) directors are Malays,
and the former Prime Minister work as Consultant in Petronas.
(3) 3% of Petronas employees are Chinese.
(4) 99% of 2000 Petronas gasoline stations are owned by Malays.
(5) 100% all contractors working under Petronas projects must be "bumi's
status" (Malay).
(6) 0% of non-Malays staffs are legally required in Malay's companies. But
there must be 30% Malays staffs in Chinese companies and shareholder. Which
this mean non-Malays own company needs to give their property to Malays.
And non-Malays citizen can't really own their business.
(7) 5% of all new intake for government police, nurses, army, is
non-Malays.
(8) 2% is the present Chinese staff in Royal Malaysian Air Force (RMAF),
drop from 40% in 1960.
(9) 2% is the percentage of non-Malays government servants in Putrajaya (
Malaysia main government office). But Malays make up 98%.
(10) 7% is the percentage of Chinese government servants in the whole
government (in 2004), drop from 30% in 1960. Only 2 position for non-Malays
in political status.
(11) 95% of government contracts are given to Malays; even it is an open
tender. Non-Malays contractors tender the lower price and use better
materials can't get the contract that government given.
(12) 100% all business licenses are controlled by Malay government e.g.
Taxi permits, Approved permits, etc. and all the license are given to
government officer families.
(13) 80% of the Chinese rice millers in Kedah (north of peninsular Malaysia
had to be sold to Malay and controlled by Bernas (Government Org.) since
1980s. Otherwise, life is make difficult for Chinese rice millers.
(14) 100 big companies set up, owned and managed by Chinese Malaysians were
taken over by government, and later managed by Malays since 1970's e.g.
UTC, UMBC, MISC, etc. This company now is the sole company.
(15) At least 10 Chinese owned bus companies (throughout
Malaysia,throughout 40 years) had to be sold to MARA or other Malay
transport companies due to rejection by Malay authority to Chinese
application for bus routes and rejection for their application for new
buses.
(16) 2 Chinese taxi drivers were barred from driving in Johor (South of
Peninsular Malaysia ) Larkin bus station. There are about 30 taxi drivers
and 3 are Chinese in October 2004. Spoiling taxi club properties was the
reason given.
(17) 0 non-Malays are allowed to get shop lots in the new Muar (city in
south peninsular Malaysia ) bus station (November 2004).
(18) 8000 billions ringgit is the total amount the government channeled to
Malays pockets through ASB, ASN, MARA, privatization of government agencies
like Tabung Haji etc, through NEP over 34 years periods.
(19) 48 Chinese primary schools closed down since 1968 รข¤" 2000
(20) 144 Tamil primary schools closed down since 1968 - 2000
(21) 2637 Malay primary schools built since 1968 - 2000
(22) 2.5% is government budget for Chinese primary schools. Tamil schools
got only 1%, Malay schools got 96.5%
(23) While a Chinese parent with RM1000 salary (monthly) cannot get
school-text-book-loan, and a Malay parent with RM2000 salary is eligible.
(24) 10 all public universities vice chancellors are Malays. And politics
in universities are held by Malays. If non-Malays want to form a politics
parties, there is no way to get approved.
(25) 5% - the government universities lecturers of non-Malay origins had
been reduced from about 70% in 1965 to only 5% in 2004 with the reason
Malaysia Education Ministry give full support for Malays only.
(26) Only 5% is given to non-Malays for government scholarships over 40
years.
(27) 0 Chinese or Indians were sent to Japan and Korea under "Look East
Policy".
(28) 128 STPM (High Study / A Level) Chinese top students could not get
into the course that they aspired i.e. Medicine and doctors (in 2004).
Malays with not qualify result can get into the course.
(29) 10% place for non-bumi students for MARA science schools beginning
from year 2003, but only 7% are filled. Before that it was 100% Malays.
(30) 50 cases whereby Chinese and Indian Malaysians, are beaten up in the
National Service program since 2003.
(31) 25% is Malaysian Chinese population in 2004, drop from 45% since 1957
because government are not support non-Malays like government support
Malays.
(32) 7% is the present Malaysian Indians population (2004), a drop from 12%
since 1957.
(33) 2 millions Chinese Malaysians had emigrated to overseas since 40 years
ago due to unfair politics.
(34) 0.5 million Indians Malaysians had emigrated to overseas.
(35) 3 millions Indonesians had migrated into Malaysia and became malaysian
citizens with bumi's status.
(36) 600000 are the Chinese and Indians Malaysians with "red I/C" (a
temporary identity card) and were rejected repeatedly when applying for
citizenship for 40 years. Perhaps 60% of them had already passed away due
to old age. This shows racism of how easily Indonesians got their
citizenships compare with the Chinese and Indians
(37) 5% - 15% discount for a Malay to buy a house, regardless whether the
Malay is rich or poor
(38) 2% is what Chinese new villages get compare with 98% of what Malays
villages got for rural development budget..
(39) 50 road names (at least) had been change from Chinese names to other
names.
(40) 1 Dewan Gan Boon Leong (in Malacca) was altered to other name (
e.g.Dewan Serbaguna or sort) when it was being officially used for a few
days. Government tries to shun Chinese names. This racism happened in
around year 2000 or sort.
(41) 0 temples/churches were built for each housing estate. But every
housing estate MUST got at least one mosque/surau built.
(42) 3000 mosques/surau were built in all housing estates throughout
Malaysia since 1970 with full government support. No temples, no churches
are built in housing estates that supported by government.
(43) 1 Catholic Church in Shah Alam took 20 years to apply to be
constructed. But told by Malay authority that it must look like a factory
and can't look like a church. Still not yet approved since 2004.
(44) 1 publishing of Bible in Iban language banned (in 2002)
(45) 0 of the government TV stations (RTM1, RTM2, and TV3) have directors
of non-Malays origin.
(46) 30 government produced TV dramas and films always showed that the bad
guys had Chinese face, and the good guys had Malay face. You can check it
out since 1970s. Recent years, this tendency becomes less.
(47) 10 times, at least, Malays (especially Umno) had threatened to
massacre the Chinese Malaysians using May 13 since 1969.
(48) 20 constituencies won by DAP would not get funds from the government
to develop. Or these Chinese majority constituencies would be the last to
be developed
(49) 100 constituencies (parliaments and states) had been racist
re-delineated so Chinese voters were diluted that Chinese candidates,
particularly DAP candidates lost in election since 1970s
(50) Only 3 out of 12 human rights items are ratified by Malaysia
government since 1960
(51) 0 elimination of, all forms of racial discrimination (UN Human
Rights)is not ratified by Malaysia government since 1960s
(52) 20 reported cases whereby Malay ambulance attendance treated Chinese
patients inhumanely, and Malay government hospital staffs purposely delay
attending to Chinese patients in 2003. Unreported cases may be 200
(53) 50 cases each year whereby Chinese, especially Chinese youths being
beaten up by Malay youths in public places. We may check at police reports
provided the police took the report, otherwise there will be no record
(54) 20 cases every year whereby Chinese drivers who accidentally knocked
down Malays were seriously assaulted or killed by Malays
(55) 12% is what ASB/ASN (Malays Own banks) got per annum while banks fixed
deposit is only about 3.5% per annum.
And more cases haven't been discovered.
Saturday 5 January 2008
Don't Forget when You are in China!
A man went on a business to China and wanted to buy some gifts for his kids. He went to a shop and found a nice looking CD player.
Wary of buying inferior goods, he asked the shopkeeper, 'What would happened if this does not work?'
The shopkeeper quietly points to the only sign in English that reads:
'GUARANTEE NO SPOILT'
Feeling assured, he paid for the CD player and returns to his hotel. He tried to use the CD player after returning to the hotel but it would not even switch on.
He quickly return to the shop and asked for a refund or an exchange for another unit. When the shopkeeper refused to give either, the man points to the sign assuring him of a guarantee.
The shopkeeper then said, 'Brother, you are in China . We read from the right to the left.'
Wary of buying inferior goods, he asked the shopkeeper, 'What would happened if this does not work?'
The shopkeeper quietly points to the only sign in English that reads:
'GUARANTEE NO SPOILT'
Feeling assured, he paid for the CD player and returns to his hotel. He tried to use the CD player after returning to the hotel but it would not even switch on.
He quickly return to the shop and asked for a refund or an exchange for another unit. When the shopkeeper refused to give either, the man points to the sign assuring him of a guarantee.
The shopkeeper then said, 'Brother, you are in China . We read from the right to the left.'
Thursday 3 January 2008
Malaysian health minister quits over sex video
PUTRAJAYA, Malaysia (Reuters) - Malaysia's health minister resigned on Wednesday, a day after he shocked the nation by admitting he was the man in a widely circulated sex video.
Prime Minister Abdullah Ahmad Badawi said he had accepted the resignation of Health Minister Chua Soi Lek, who apologized after two lengthy DVDs hit the streets showing him engaging in sexual acts with an unidentified woman.
The scandal is the latest in a series of problems plaguing Abdullah's government, which has been widely expected to call a snap election in the coming weeks.
"After I made my confession, I had hoped Malaysians would be able to accept my apology," he said. "Unfortunately, from the feedback I received, I observed that Malaysians cannot accept it."
"Some Malaysians have a holier-than-thou attitude," Chua, a doctor by training, told a packed news conference at his office. "At the end of the day, it just tells you that honesty sometimes does not pay."
Chua, who said the woman was a "personal friend", had insisted on Tuesday he would not resign over the issue, drawing a sharp rebuke from people within and outside government.
The New Straits Times, controlled by Abdullah's ruling party, said in a commentary Chua should quit to save the government from further anguish.
Abdullah, a devout Muslim, won a record mandate in 2004 polls on a pledge to clean up the government and fight corruption.
"For a top politician you can't continue in power when you are seen naked," said political analyst Ooi Kee Beng.
ABDULLAH'S HEADACHES
The prime minister said he had been shocked by the news but stressed that the episode was unlikely to undermine his coalition's election preparations.
"He (Chua) has taken responsibility over what had happened. I feel it was an appropriate decision taken by him," he said, adding that Chua's position would be filled later.
Chua, a father of three, said he did not make the DVDs. Newspapers said they were closed-circuit recordings made two years ago in a hotel room. One DVD lasted 56 minutes and the other 44 minutes.
Police were probing the case, trying to establish who made the recordings and how four cameras came to be in the room of a hotel in the southern state of Johor, the New Straits Times said.
Abdullah's four-year-old administration has been beset with major problems lately, a sign he may be forced to delay elections beyond March, when many had expected them to take place.
In late November, more than 10,000 ethnic Indians took to the streets in an unprecedented protest over racial discrimination.
More info HERE.
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